Torn between 2 woman

[swiftee]

Need some advice from the bro here. Do excuse my bad "england".
I have been married for close to 6 years. Recently, i got to know this "S" whom is a air stewardness. I got very attracted to her and we been going out v often.

When my wife got pregnant 2 years ago i panic. I been fooling around but with protected sex at geylang and those occassion "ons". I was so scared that i quickly went to do all the blood test. Dont want my wife or baby to get any disease. Fortunately for me everything is alright. Back then, i make a promise never to "Fuck ard" anymore.

To the present day, "S" sense something wrong with me cos i never wanted to have sex wif her. She hinted me that im like a cat wanted to eat the fish but afraid to get wet. But damm i can tell u i wanted to bonk her so badly that, that is the last thing i wanted to do. But i feel so guilty whenever i remember the promise i made years ago... but my urge is getting stronger n stronger....i think i cannot tahan anymore.

Well, i know having a affair is wrong but i cannot control. Sigh....

[_AXL_]

easy... just stay away from the bloody fish lah!!! dont put yourself in that same compromising position and u wont have a situation. go home play with yr kid and then play with yr wife.

sorry if u r looking for replies egging u on to go fuck the stewardess. remember, cause and effect. can u take the consequences??? if yes, then go ahead and fuck her brains out, if she had any in the first place.;)

[Gaofar]

Hahaha..

You, bro swiftee, is sandwiching your own self by your own reasons and counter reasons...

What bro AXL says is right that you shouldn't be asking bros here what YOU are suppose to do.. What you need is just a simple elimination procedure..

1. Do you love your wife and children?
2. Are you intend to keep that promise you make?
3. Is that stewardess that irresistible?
4. Would you think you will break that promise just for the stewardess as being the exception case?

All in all, yours seems to be a case of you want to play but due to because of your promise and didn't want to be guilty, dares not play.. Now, is the reason of you wanted to play is because of your wife not being able to satisfy you anymore? Or short of saying you wanted to play (which means you want to cheong GL, FL, whatever..), is it that you just want to have a FB with that stewardess of yours?

Let me tell you something. It's alright to be all saint and everything and being a great father and man for your wife (which is good and something you should be proud of) but I'll say most men errs and thus the simple connotation of "if you want to eat secretly, do remember to wipe off your mouth" would apply should you want to embark on a "covet-mission".. (I never says I'm a saint anyway.. Bwahahaha!..) :D

[mike1304k]

Bro,

I understand how you feel because I also have a really SWT mina who really drives me wild. Guess what, I only sms her because I know that if I go any further, I will end up doing something I will be ashamed of. Why do I not want to do it? Because I am happy with my wife and we are going to have a baby soon.

From what I understand, you have no complaints about your wife and are happy with your marriage. But you are faced with having a nice fish for a meal, as long as you are willing to get wet... But bro.... fish bone damn sharp... and if lodged inside.... you need to go hospital to get it out... Savvy?

Why look for trouble when you do not need it? It has been long proven that even the most mature FB's will have to have some form of investment. In time or money or something else.

Now that you have a happy family, just find FL and WL and fire and forget... Don eat fish and get pricked, hor?

Wish you luck.

[swiftee]

Thank you all the bros for the precious advices.

Hmm... after having the baby my wife spend most of the time looking after the baby and also working. 1 month the most "do" once or twice ( everytime she not interested to perform ) end up using my own hand 99% of the time. And she also become quite short temper maybe too much chasing n screaming at our over active kid.

I appreciate my wife giving me a baby. But with that her body also transform. No doubt, she is still slim. But can still see the stretch marks on the tummy and also the ugly C-section scar. The papayas definitely dont look that good anymore too. I believe many bros here with wife that given birth can attest to that. Some how it also affected my appetite. But sometime when i want sex she also dont give... :(

So sian all the time, got to endure her temper. Then came "S" she everything i wanted.
I realy felt like embarking on a "covert mission" but guilt, promise to myself n god. Damm this urge of mine....

[Compassion]

Bro Swiftee, if your urge is uncontrolable, visit a FL and release it. Got no contacts? Pm me and I will give you one.

Introduce your "S" to me and I will resolve the problem for you..:D

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Speaking from personal experience, sometimes its good to have another one outside the house.
At the end of the day, you'll come back a happy man.
Just remember to bring your happiness home but do not bring what brought you happiness home to do comparisons and all will be peaceful & well.

[fanaticd]

hi bro, for your wife to be unhappy, does she has any slight idea that you are with another woman? for her strange reactions to you. i am not sure whether this is post natal blues. you will need to monitor. woman are very sensitive

as for your S, she knows that you are married right? so for long term, what will be her objectives? some woman are just out to get back at you and leave when time comes.

It will be no point to give up a family for a good time in bed. the FL and those legally in geylang can satisfied your urge. Family should come first as broken family can cause a lot of stress.

You need to consider the consequences. S can just be a passer by in your life. Lastly, the true colors may be hidden. haha... coz you have not fully landed in her hands

[colins]

No right no wrong. The only thing is, what you promised yourself, can you bear to let yourself down for S.

Borrowing the analogy by S, when you are hungry (wife dun give you sextisfaction) and when there is only one fish in the world (S), naturally you get the urge to go eat it. This is human instinct what. Flip side is, once you break your own promise, you'll respect yourself less, you go down as a loser sooner or later becos trust me, you will regret the affair if you can't handle the consequence (if your wife finds out, short temper as she is)

Of cos, what's written above has no moral inclination but rather is on fulfilment which everybody needs in life. Its like when one part of our lives got lacking, esp on the human instinct aspect like sex, the natural animalistic sense is to fulfill it. Fighting it makes you feel like shit, then you get into the cycle of self-doubt whether the earlier decision is worth it or not. On the other hand, once you makan her she will just turn into another piece of meat to you. One cunt is the same as another. Then the realisation will set in that you broke your own promise which you held for tenacity. Guilt follows, strengthening everytime she calls you or your wife calls you. Either way, whether you eat her or not, you'll feel shit. If you kenna stuck in a decision like this, you'll know that in a very short while, or even now, you'll set for more suffering. How's that for life?

So I guess, the decision is NOT on whether you should have sex with her. Cos either choice will not bring you long-term happiness. It is in finding out what fulfilment you need to satisfy yourself. After this, then you can find purpose in either telling her that you can only be friend not FB or you can turn her into a full fledge sex release item but with a huge guilt buggage. Whatever makes you happy bro. ;)

[joew2005]

I wouldn't think that yr situation is really "torn bet 2 women".
2 me it's like a battle bet yr big head vs yr small head.
Yr hv 2 weighted the pros & cons bet going 1 way or the other......
Others k advise or give their opinions,but u would be the 1 facing the music @ the dn of the day.

[mike1304k]

Bro,

You are not torn between 2 women... It is just the love for you wife and lust for S. Let me tell you that your wife is most probably someone you should really cherish. You played around and unless she had no clue, which sometimes we mistake, but they just do not want to rock the boat so they do not confront you. But she still stayed with you and gave you a child. Now you should be happy with your family and your life.

Itchy, get it scratched. Go find a FL and Wl and pay, fark and go... Why must play with someone else? I know it feels great man... and your ego feels good as you are wanted by an air stewardess. However, ego and so on aside... even you admit that having an affair while married is not good, so you have answered your own dilema liao... I do hope you have the strength to do the right thing and the wise thing.

[a79344]

I'm sure TS already new the answer. The simplest solution would be to break all contacts with her. If you are really determined, bring your wife and kids along the next time you meet "S". Show her how happy you are with your family. I believe "S" will take the hint and siam you. Assuming you succumb to temptation once in a while, I'm sure "S" wouldn't want to make out with you since images of your happy family will keep flashing in her mind.

Of cos, the choice is entirely up to you. It is easy for me, as an outsider, to comment. It is the question of what is more important: Your family or your lust and whether can you handle the consequences arising from your actions.

Cheers!

[smellycat]

So sian all the time, got to endure her temper. Then came "S" she everything i wanted.
I realy felt like embarking on a "covert mission" but guilt, promise to myself n god. Damm this urge of mine....

i like your avatar. meow! :p

personally i believe you should not go near another fish if you cannot control your urges. if you want to play then learn to control yourself and draw the line clearly :rolleyes:

good luck bro ;)

[QQBoy]

It's alright to have an affair as long as you continue to love you family, and S is agreeable to be your no. 2. You must tell yourself that the relationship you have with S will not take you away from your family. If S were to ask you to leave your wife, then it's time to dump her and look for another mistress. Mistresses should know the house rules and not to cross the line. In the good old days, men couild have several wifes, so let's continue the tradition of our forefathers and spread your love.

[forumer]

even if S is willing to be the 2nd.... sooner or later, her demands and expectations will change... to be the 1st....

[groo]

...married for close to 6 years....i got to know this "S" whom is a air stewardness....very attracted to her and we been going out v often....wife got pregnant 2 years ago i panic....fooling around but with protected sex at geylang and those occassion "ons"..."S" sense something wrong with me cos i never wanted to have sex wif her....feel so guilty whenever i remember the promise i made years ago... but my urge is getting stronger n stronger....i think i cannot tahan anymore....Ever think of your kid? Your kid is now 1+ yo. You should be enjoying the fruit of your union with your wife. A kid is the most fun before P1, enjoy him while you still have the chance... :D

Your wife has stretched marks and boobs are saggy? So? Apply stretch mark cream for her at night before sleeping lah! Cultivate love feelings... which may lead to good sex!

Your wife's very grouchy? I'm very sure you've not done much to look after your kid. Let your wife take a day or 2 off. Then YOU take over looking after your kid for that 1-2 days and see how stressful it can be. Then you'll appreciate what your wife goes through and why she's so grouchy.

It's obvious you've not told S about your situation? That's why she sensed that there's something wrong with you and your hesitation... By now, she should have already guessed or maybe, you've even told her. :(

If you are really itchy, go get it scratched like what 1 bro pointed out and don't have your young family sacrificed for a moment of folly!

Cheers. :)

[Panamera]

Need some advice from the bro here. Do excuse my bad "england".
I have been married for close to 6 years. Recently, i got to know this "S" whom is a air stewardness. I got very attracted to her and we been going out v often.

When my wife got pregnant 2 years ago i panic. I been fooling around but with protected sex at geylang and those occassion "ons". I was so scared that i quickly went to do all the blood test. Dont want my wife or baby to get any disease. Fortunately for me everything is alright. Back then, i make a promise never to "Fuck ard" anymore.

To the present day, "S" sense something wrong with me cos i never wanted to have sex wif her. She hinted me that im like a cat wanted to eat the fish but afraid to get wet. But damm i can tell u i wanted to bonk her so badly that, that is the last thing i wanted to do. But i feel so guilty whenever i remember the promise i made years ago... but my urge is getting stronger n stronger....i think i cannot tahan anymore.

Well, i know having a affair is wrong but i cannot control. Sigh....

T.S Me think your title is wrong, it should be
Torn Between My Promise and My Lust

Me think you will still do it despite all bros here advise you not to, after that, you will make a new promise again and again and again..Sign..sign....:(

[sammyboyfor]

Thank you all the bros for the precious advices.



Should be ".. for all the precious ADVICE.".

"Advice" is a non countable noun; you do not add an "s" to make it plural.

"Advice" is like "Rice". You say... "Please pass me the Rice." You don't say "Please pass me the rices" because "Rice", like "advice", is a non countable noun.

There are many other examples. To test your knowledge of non countable nouns, go to English Language Quiz - Countable or Non-countable Nouns (I-TESL-J) (http://a4esl.org/q/j/ck/ch-countnouns.html) and take the test.

[Panamera]

1st of all, Boss Sam, I am not challenging your post nor carrying your balls:

Difference between the words advice and advise

Advice is a noun. It is a recommendation. e.g.

His advice was sound and everyone listened to him.

I am seeking your advice because you are more experienced in such matters.

I turned down that bribe on your advice.

Advise is a verb. It means "to give advice" and therefore refers to the act of giving advice. e.g.

I would advise you to submit your resignation in view of this scandal.

My lawyer has advised me to settle this matter out of court.
__________________

[sexfrenzy]

erhh.. Sam is not talking about difference between advice & advise, but rather advice & advice(s)

[Panamera]

erhh.. Sam is not talking about difference between advice & advise, but rather advice & advice(s)

Like I mentioned, I am not carring his balls...:D

[sammyboyfor]

1st of all, Boss Sam, I am not challenging your post nor carrying your balls:


You're off on a tangent. If you want to talk about advise vs advice, go to http://www.sammyboyforum.com/adult-discussions-about-sex/120964-need-advise.html#post3580166

[Panamera]

You're off on a tangent. If you want to talk about advise vs advice, go to http://www.sammyboyforum.com/adult-discussions-about-sex/120964-need-advise.html#post3580166

Ok, Boss,

Roger, roger, I got your message.. :D

[aces68]

bro TS, unless you are sure that you can handle the emotional stress that comes with juggling two relationships at the same time, you shouldn't even consider "S".

[~sweetiebaby91~]

Pretty & Attractive ladies are everywhere..

Since u had already made ur promises why do u stil wanna think so much.

If u did it once, U'll always wanted to do it again.

And in that case, E Never Ending story begin...

What if ur wife found out about wat u had done?

How painful will this cause to her?


It's just some kind of temptations,

That often Human will go thr that.

Stop finding excuses to see her or I should say other gals again.

Treasure what u have now before it's too late.

[Oralcraz]

Thank you all the bros for the precious advices.

Hmm... after having the baby my wife spend most of the time looking after the baby and also working. 1 month the most "do" once or twice ( everytime she not interested to perform ) end up using my own hand 99% of the time. And she also become quite short temper maybe too much chasing n screaming at our over active kid.

I appreciate my wife giving me a baby. But with that her body also transform. No doubt, she is still slim. But can still see the stretch marks on the tummy and also the ugly C-section scar. The papayas definitely dont look that good anymore too. I believe many bros here with wife that given birth can attest to that. Some how it also affected my appetite. But sometime when i want sex she also dont give... :(

So sian all the time, got to endure her temper. Then came "S" she everything i wanted.
I realy felt like embarking on a "covert mission" but guilt, promise to myself n god. Damm this urge of mine....

Family harmony, happiness and peace conquers all.....including lust. Sex is a mental & physical satisfaction. Just like smoking. Don't hv won't die. Just the urge. I used to be more horny then u. After married also ended up once or none per month. Been like tis for 18 yrs now. Hv intimacy once with a colleague for 6 months (no sexual intercourse) but too stressful and obviously, nothing can come out of it being a married man.

If u can handle an affair (with the understanding of the consequences), then u decide. If u feel u cannot handle, don't do it. It may ruin yr life.

[etct88]

Ok, Boss,

Roger, roger, I got your message.. :D

Ha ha, dun play, prey, pray Boss. If wow a memory is teo, he is NZ educated in Queens England........... :p

solli, hor, my england onli S7, no credit....... nearly failed......:o

ps, all may have changed!

[FL Lover]

even if S is willing to be the 2nd.... sooner or later, her demands and expectations will change... to be the 1st....

True... No other gers in this world wants to be behind the curtains forever... My FB also started out with just pure lusts until her requirements changed and wanted to be my OFFICAL CO in my house..No way as there is already a CO in the house liao...

So know when to stop the game if necessary... Plenty of gers out there even if you drop her..

[_AXL_]

Hmm... after having the baby my wife spend most of the time looking after the baby and also working. 1 month the most "do" once or twice ( everytime she not interested to perform ) end up using my own hand 99% of the time. And she also become quite short temper maybe too much chasing n screaming at our over active kid.....

my wife and i also just had a kid... her screaming might be that she might be (might not) suffering from post-natal depression, and for some time now. seeing a doctor to dis-confirm it might be good. but i dont think so...

I appreciate my wife giving me a baby. But with that her body also transform. No doubt, she is still slim. But can still see the stretch marks on the tummy and also the ugly C-section scar. The papayas definitely dont look that good anymore too. I believe many bros here with wife that given birth can attest to that. Some how it also affected my appetite. But sometime when i want sex she also dont give...

is she not the same woman u fell in love with and married??? stretch marks and c-section scars already made u turned off. what if she got older???

i dont know about u, but u know how much pain she went through to have your baby. that is the best affirmation of love from her and now u r going to discard it like trash!!!

my wife was plied with nourishments during her pregnancy and confinement by my mum. she still has those stretch marks, not to mention that she is now still stuck at 60kg when she was about 48kg before her pregnancy. yes, the boobies r now a bit out of shape and she's got a tummy. but i pay more attention to them more, spending more time on those areas and telling her that those r indications that she is a miracle. isnt giving birth to another human being a miracle??? yr wife is tired and suffers from diminished confidence and as her husband, instead of helping and reassuring her, here u r, thinking of fucking another woman...

So sian all the time, got to endure her temper. Then came "S" she everything i wanted.
I realy felt like embarking on a "covert mission" but guilt, promise to myself n god. Damm this urge of mine

u know why yr wife is in such a bad mood??? she is so busy with your child... and yet u have time to go out gallivanting with other women!!! how about spending time to take yr child off her hands to let her rest??? then she would have time to go pamper herself, doll up a bit, do some slimming or just purely have a good rest. i m sure then, she wont be in such a bad mood. but not for u, i m sure u r too busy!!! busy with yr urge. i guess u r not ready to start a family... then why do it in the first place?

why m i so pissed with u, u might wonder... cos in yr post, u r defending yourself, trying to justify your tryst (which i know is certain to happen) by blaming it on yr wife...:mad: so with that, i hope that the stewardess turns out to be a case of glenn close in fatal attraction.

[groo]

...u know why yr wife is in such a bad mood??? she is so busy with your child... and yet u have time to go out gallivanting with other women!!! how about spending time to take yr child off her hands to let her rest??? then she would have time to go pamper herself, doll up a bit, do some slimming or just purely have a good rest. i m sure then, she wont be in such a bad mood. but not for u, i m sure u r too busy!!! busy with yr urge. i guess u r not ready to start a family... then why do it in the first place?...That's why I proposed the TS lets his wifey take days off and he took over looking after his kid. I've been doing it for many years now.

It's through this period that the TS will learn what it's like to be with a kid who will just stick to you like a leach wherever you go and you will feel suffocating. That's because the kid is defenceless and depends on the parent for everything. BUT that's the beauty of the whole thing, appreciate the time with the kid and you'll discover that it is really a bundle of joy. Once you miss the 1st 6 years of the kid's life, it's gone forever. It's the golden period of the kid's life - ENJOY IT!!! :p

The other benefit of this process is that the TS will Bloody appreciate his wife more, much much more!!! :D

Hope he wakes up...

Cheers!

[_AXL_]

That's why I proposed the TS lets his wifey take days off and he took over looking after his kid. I've been doing it for many years now.

It's through this period that the TS will learn what it's like to be with a kid who will just stick to you like a leach wherever you go and you will feel suffocating. That's because the kid is defenceless and depends on the parent for everything. BUT that's the beauty of the whole thing, appreciate the time with the kid and you'll discover that it is really a bundle of joy. Once you miss the 1st 6 years of the kid's life, it's gone forever. It's the golden period of the kid's life - ENJOY IT!!! :p

The other benefit of this process is that the TS will Bloody appreciate his wife more, much much more!!! :D

Hope he wakes up...

Cheers!

precisely... wifey got stretch marks but dont give wifey time to go for beauty sessions to lighten them. oh, TS, pls dont tell me u cannot afford it!!! u've got $$$ to go romance stewardess lor...

if i m not wrong, his child is about a year old now. that is really the golden period cos their minds now r like sponges, picking up new stuff every single day. isnt that exciting??? obviously, not as exciting as fucking another woman... i just wonder why some people can be so detached from their own flesh and blood... enough said. think our words will fall on deaf ears.

[groo]

...his child is about a year old now. that is really the golden period cos their minds now r like sponges, picking up new stuff every single day. isnt that exciting??? obviously, not as exciting as fucking another woman... i just wonder why some people can be so detached from their own flesh and blood... enough said. think our words will fall on deaf ears.Fucking another woman can be done on another day, another year, even when you are 60+ lao-kok-kok also can bonk SYT!

But miss your child's first baby steps, first spoken words, his toothless grin and innocent laughter, his pure and wonderful ways... blah-blah-blah... now this one even the SYTs cannot fight leh!!! :D

Wake up, WAKE UP!!! :D

[swiftee]

Like to thank all the bros again for replying and some gave very enlightening advice.
My wife have been to slimming center and i did paid for the entire package. I still pamper n give in to her alot just like before marriage. And i definitely love my 2 yrs old baby. Im doing all the cleaning and mopping of the house including laundry after i reached home everyday. She only has to wash her own underwear! The problem started not too long after birth. Sometime she would just throw her tantrum at me and i left wondering what did i do to deserve it. Most of the time i walk away sometime cannot avoid and quarrel. About 3 months ago she even threaten to stab me with a knife. Well hope things will get better.

Back to "S" i already confronted her last sunday night. i told her i wanted out from the relationship. I explained to her and we talk for a long time in the car. She is v stern and refuse breaking up with me. I did not reply her smses for the past few days. She will be flying back soon... Let fate decides what happen next.

[_AXL_]

Fucking another woman can be done on another day, another year, even when you are 60+ lao-kok-kok also can bonk SYT!

But miss your child's first baby steps, first spoken words, his toothless grin and innocent laughter, his pure and wonderful ways... blah-blah-blah... now this one even the SYTs cannot fight leh!!!

u hit the nail on the head... got money, got SYT honey.

your own flesh and blood, your DNA, your surname... something that no one can take away, and yet some people choose to ignore the most important things in life.

Like to thank all the bros again for replying and some gave very enlightening advice.
My wife have been to slimming center and i did paid for the entire package. I still pamper n give in to her alot just like before marriage. And i definitely love my 2 yrs old baby. Im doing all the cleaning and mopping of the house including laundry after i reached home everyday. She only has to wash her own underwear! The problem started not too long after birth. Sometime she would just throw her tantrum at me and i left wondering what did i do to deserve it. Most of the time i walk away sometime cannot avoid and quarrel. About 3 months ago she even threaten to stab me with a knife. Well hope things will get better.

if that is really the case, u really need to bring your wife to the doctor's. it might really be post-natal depression. in some cases, it could last for years. if it isnt post-natal depression, i suggest u have a good talk with her when she is calm. if u cant, then go see a counsellor. something's obviously bugging your wife to make her wanna stab u with a knife. hoping things would get better would not do... u need to get that fat ass off the couch and solve the problem.

Back to "S" i already confronted her last sunday night. i told her i wanted out from the relationship. I explained to her and we talk for a long time in the car. She is v stern and refuse breaking up with me. I did not reply her smses for the past few days. She will be flying back soon... Let fate decides what happen next.

telling u "i told u so" is pointless. ignoring her would not make her go away. u have to face her and face the consequences. go and apologise to her parents and family members, tell them the truth but make sure u make it very clear that u want out, cos u r choosing your family over her.

but it appears u like to hope and let fate decide instead of facing up to the consequences and do what needs to be done.

[Panamera]

Like to thank all the bros again for replying and some gave very enlightening advice.
My wife have been to slimming center and i did paid for the entire package. I still pamper n give in to her alot just like before marriage. And i definitely love my 2 yrs old baby. Im doing all the cleaning and mopping of the house including laundry after i reached home everyday. She only has to wash her own underwear! The problem started not too long after birth. Sometime she would just throw her tantrum at me and i left wondering what did i do to deserve it. Most of the time i walk away sometime cannot avoid and quarrel. About 3 months ago she even threaten to stab me with a knife. Well hope things will get better.

Back to "S" i already confronted her last sunday night. i told her i wanted out from the relationship. I explained to her and we talk for a long time in the car. She is v stern and refuse breaking up with me. I did not reply her smses for the past few days. She will be flying back soon... Let fate decides what happen next.

Hi Bro, KK Women's and Children's Hospital (KKH) started a pilot programme mid last year to help identify women with post-natal depression

Post-natal depression can arise when women have difficulties coping with their babies, especially if they are burdened with other worries. These commonly include financial and marital woes, or even moving to a new home. Sometimes, the depression goes away when issues are resolved but if untreated, the condition can last a year or longer.

A baby learns from 'mirroring' his mother, but will not be able to pick up much from a depressed mum, who tends not to hold, smile, talk or read to the baby as often as a healthy one and post-natal depression can also weaken bonding between mother and baby, and stunt a child's emotional and intellectual development.

Please go for a screening and check it out if it is helpful. PM me if further help needed. Good luck.

[Marblecat]

With all due respect, I think Axl has stated the main points clearly.

Look, we're all men. We like to fuck, We're built to fuck. That has nothing at all to do with the way you Swiftee perceive your wife. Sure, let's not have overkill and say that having a child is the most noble thing in the world ... But to cast condemnation on a woman you supposedly married for better or worse for a few physical "defects" inflicted by having your child? It beggars belief.

And it looks like you're not talking just physical intimacy here, you're considering emotional betrayal. Actually, even that I would suspect is mainly ego driven.

That last post of yours makes it clear that the eventual price you will have to pay for any dalliance will be high. Essentially, there should be a big neon sign flashing at you: "I want you to stab the things that by right should matter most, the stability and love of your wife, the potential happiness and future of your kid, the peace in your families, your own peace of mind - all for a few possibly good fucks and an uncertain future, which even if it happens, may turn boring, routine, and stale as the marriage you now take for granted".

Well, dude, the knife is in your hands. You don't really have a decision to make, more of a way to justify your shortsightedness to yourself in the near future.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Yup, very post natal depression symtoms....
There is help available for this, dun let it slide or it may just get worse!

[slider_72]

Sudden rage but otherwise at times ok? May be bipolar disorder. Better bring your wife go see a doctor.

[Panamera]

Bro T.S,

The Perinatal Depression and Anxiety Support Group provides support for women who experience depression during pregnancy and follows up on their progress after delivery. Members meet every other Tuesday afternoon in KK Women's and Children's Hospital. This support group conducts sessions in English and is headed by a psychiatrist and case manager. Tel: 6394-3739. Wishing you a happy family. :D

[Oralcraz]

Like to thank all the bros again for replying and some gave very enlightening advice.
My wife have been to slimming center and i did paid for the entire package. I still pamper n give in to her alot just like before marriage. And i definitely love my 2 yrs old baby. Im doing all the cleaning and mopping of the house including laundry after i reached home everyday. She only has to wash her own underwear! The problem started not too long after birth. Sometime she would just throw her tantrum at me and i left wondering what did i do to deserve it. Most of the time i walk away sometime cannot avoid and quarrel. About 3 months ago she even threaten to stab me with a knife. Well hope things will get better.

Back to "S" i already confronted her last sunday night. i told her i wanted out from the relationship. I explained to her and we talk for a long time in the car. She is v stern and refuse breaking up with me. I did not reply her smses for the past few days. She will be flying back soon... Let fate decides what happen next.

Bro, my wifey has quite similar situation as yours but not to the extend of "threat with knife". She used to lose her temper and emotion very easily too. Did not want to do house work. Demand for maid and lost patience with the child. At 28, she even didn't want to work anymore. One moment was smiling, just one unacceptable word from me and "bomb" total change. Face black like charcoal and even when I talk to her, she will not even answer me. Worse if in-laws side got involved. I was also very stress out and very pressurised. I was always second to her and her sisters are first. Even thought of counselling but did not opt for it. That goes on for years. I tried to understand what's the problem and one day, I found the answer. Is like enlightenment. I realised what she wanted and why she behave that way. She wanted to be a empress, but unfortunately, I am no emperor. She thought she can get her way by giving me cold shoulder and emotional pressure but of course it does not work...cos sometimes in life, cannot fulfill means cannot. Although is irrational, childish, but I always tell myself one thing. Wife is choose by myself. For good or not, hv to accept. I just try to do my best, gave the family what I can but if I can't, I just say sorry, cannot.

As for u, the road ahead is still very long. Suggest u tried your very best to talk to her in a very gentle fashion. Understand her. If she cannot provide u with a reason, then suggest going to a counsellor or doctor. Believe me. If u put show yr sincerity, she will appreciate and hopefully to the better. Good luck.

As for 'S' is yr call. I know is hard to resist sex and lust...but just a reminder; remember the ex-stewardess who throw her garung guni FB daughter down the block of flats!!!

[Megatronzombie]

Bro TS, ur wife may be experiencing post natal depression, even after 1 year it might surface. U need to discuss with her and consult a gynea or something. Its not her fault, hormones is playing tricks on her. Must b understanding.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

I learnt this from a very close female friend sometime back and i felt its worth sharing.

It isnt easy being a woman....NOT WL hor...this is normal day to day woman
Have to take care of Him
Have to serve him
Have to be his whore
Have to fulfill his fantasy
Have to bow head
Have to submit
Have to bear 10mths pain
Have to bear him babies
Have to endure his temper
Have to swallow our pride on many occassions
Must make sure he dun loose face
Must close eyes to his vice

Him?????
Just bring money back & gets everything as and when he wants it...whether we like it or in the mood or not!
If not, we may just loose our man.
Damn meaningful
That shud get u thinking ya.....................................

So TS, dun just complain about the sudden changes, look deep, understand and find the root of the prob.
Everything has a root, a cause, a beginning, and which path we take to solve the prob will determine the end.

[swiftee]

Thanks Panamera, Oralcraz and DO_YOU_BJ ...etc My wife have thyroid problem too. Will try to convince her to take look at the Perinatal Depression and Anxiety Support Group at K.K woman n kids Hospital.

[groo]

... My wife have been to slimming center and i did paid for the entire package
... I still pamper n give in to her alot just like before marriage. And i definitely love my 2 yrs old baby
... problem started not too long after birth...throw her tantrum
... 3 months ago she even threaten to stab me with a knife
*** "S" i already confronted her ...told her i wanted out from the relationship...She is v stern and refuse breaking up...did not reply her smses for the past few days...Let fate decides what happen next.
Your wife's definitely hit by post-natal blues! The fact that she threatened you with a knife is a concern, because she may just threatened her own child as well. There have been such reported cases. I'm not trying to scare you. I'm just telling you it's something to be concerned about. :(

You are on the right track bringing her to the slimming centre. All women are vain and this may help soothe her nerves. But you'll need to spend time communicating with her more. This may help you discover what's bothering her and in the process, decide if further action is needed, such as getting psychiatric help or otherwise. Many bros above have given you the information for help that you may just need.

Spending more time at home will also help. She sees you playing happily with your precious child and she may just get the emotional balance she rightly needed. Soon she'll join in and hopefully, it'll turn out for the better. :p

As for S, you may also need to know exactly what it is she wants. Most sane woman will not want to break up another woman's family. Either you have done something to her, promised her something which cannot be delivered now or she's just pissed. You just gotta sort it out with her and not leave it to chance. If you still can't resolve the problem, talk to somebody or seek professional help.

Hang in there, bro. If you are doing what you have claimed, you're on the right track... :p

Cheers! :)

[swiftee]

I posted a reply earlier and wonder why the admin did not post it. Here it is again.
Thanks Panamera, Oralcraz , DO_YOU_BJ, groo and others for valuable advice. Will definitely convince my wife to go to Perinatal Depression and Anxiety Support Group KK Women's and Children's Hospital.

[Derelict]

Postpartum depression not prenatal depression. From reading your post its more or less after birth that things took a turn.

Other than the biological aspect, there are other issues helping to drive her deeper into her depressive state. Its usually the lack of communication that break a relationship. She can pop all the prozac the doctor prescribed but the end results will still be what the husband do to help bring her out of her 'stupor'.

I learned the hard way. My job requires that I travel often. That usually means staying at one corner of the world and than to another. Before my wife got 'shotgunned' she travel along. Issues crop up after the birth of our daughter. It was nothing at first but gradually my mother-in-law as well as my mom notice minute changes in her.

We took steps and I think what brought her out of her miasma was more or less our daily conversations. At first we talk about superficial stuff. It gradually became more private. She was being self critical. I took appropriate steps in reassuring her. By building her confidence I think it help us solidify our relationship.

I know its hard to start a conversation now after so many years but if you take steps in finding out her interest I think thats the best bet in starting one up.

As for the other woman. I have no comment.

[axor3333]

[Well, i know having a affair is wrong but i cannot control. Sigh....[/QUOTE]


Bro Swiftee

I can understand your feeling. I am just like you but my children are big and I have little time with them and at home, sex is only once a week not enough. Know Z for about 4 years whether I travel for Biz, Z will follow me until my Biz parter though she my wife. Z can provide what I want.

But end of the day. When I reach home, we are still in one family that what I want. When eat outside clean your mouth before coming home.

[Big B]

I think a lot of bros here have already given you tons of advice on why you should take good care of your Mrs. There is simply too much at stake and news of an affair could prove to be the tipping point.

On the other hand, it is VERY tough to resist a hot young lady who desires you even though you know its wrong. Your words leaving things to fate may be a sign of weakness. E.g. if S turns up in front of me and shows me (convincingly) she doesn't want anything other then great sex, it will be ok for me to fuck her brains out... etc.

IMHO, leaving things to fate is in reality, denying the truth of the matter. Women change their minds all the time. You can't anticipate nor can you stop it.

When I was younger, I had the good sense to put 100% of my efforts into my career. Hailing from a humble background, I burnt weekends working part-time to put myself through tertiary education. I met my GF (now wife) when things were tough and she even gave me money when things were really tight.

Now that I am relatively successful (>150k per annum), these memories give me the strength to resist temptation when they inevitably occur. Try your best to recall memories of why you love your wife and they will give you the strength to resist the predations of S.

Hope the above helps.

P.S. Just in case some bros think I'm pure... nothing is further from the truth. I just know where the line is between a strictly commercial arrangement vs. an emotional entanglement. :D

[spidey69]

[QUOTE=swiftee;3576313]

I appreciate my wife giving me a baby. But with that her body also transform. No doubt, she is still slim. But can still see the stretch marks on the tummy and also the ugly C-section scar. The papayas definitely dont look that good anymore too. I believe many bros here with wife that given birth can attest to that. Some how it also affected my appetite. But sometime when i want sex she also dont give... :(

QUOTE]

Fuck you TS.:mad:

your wife get the stretch marks and C-section scar from where? she get it from the sky.. fuck your bloody asshole, she get it becos she gave birth to your kid..

Chee bye TS, u wanna eat outside, blame it on yourself. dun be a fucker and try to push the blame to your wife..

I hope u 1 day go n kill yourself, becos you break up your own family over another pussy.:mad:

[BroRelax]

She hinted me that im like a cat wanted to eat the fish but afraid to get wet.

Freak not TS. Feed me that fish as i am a cat too! Meow.. :p

[spidey69]

[QUOTE=swiftee;3576313]

I appreciate my wife giving me a baby. But with that her body also transform. No doubt, she is still slim. But can still see the stretch marks on the tummy and also the ugly C-section scar. The papayas definitely dont look that good anymore too. I believe many bros here with wife that given birth can attest to that. Some how it also affected my appetite. But sometime when i want sex she also dont give... :(

QUOTE]

Fuck you TS.:mad:

your wife get the stretch marks and C-section scar from where? she get it from the sky.. fuck your bloody asshole, she get it becos she gave birth to your kid..

Chee bye TS, u wanna eat outside, blame it on yourself. dun be a fucker and try to push the blame to your wife..

I hope u 1 day go n kill yourself, becos you break up your own family over another pussy.:mad:

to the chee bye kia who zap me becos of this post,

fuck you.. :mad:

go home fuck your dog or something... chee bye..

i sincerely wish your lan jiao will be rotten