Does Having Kids Affect Your Sex Life With Your Spouse?

[thaivisitor]

I know this is applicable to those who are married but I think the info will do good to those who are not married but will be going to marry one day.

Some women loses interest in sex after giving birth to a child. Some women feels more tired looking after a child in the day. Some children still sleeps in the same room or even same bed as the parents, and many more situations, etc, etc.

So if you have a kid, whether new born or school going age, does it affect your sex life with your spouse?

If it does, how? And what do you do about it?
If it doesn't, why? How did you manage to maintain or improve your sex life?

Cheers

thaivisitor
Thaivisitor’s Annual Samsters Trip to Hatyai!
GL Lor 10 Coffeeshop TCSS Session On 1 March 2005

[Cheri_Popper]

Well, I am married with 2 kids between the age of 6-8. Both of them sleep in the same room as me & wifey citing "afraid of the dark" reason!

What I will do is that sometimes I sneaked back from the office in the afternoon to have a "quickie" as both my kids then are in school! :D

If not, wait till they are sound asleep before doing "it" in the bathroom!

[Bangkok Master]

So if you have a kid, whether new born or school going age, does it affect your sex life with your spouse?



Definately man! My gf is expecting our first child and she's about 5 months pregant and we had not had sex for the last 3 months due to the fact that she heard from someone mentioning that it might affect the head of the baby. So I "lan lan" never got to bonk her for the last 3 months, luckily she knows that I'm a high sex drive person so she allows me to go for commercial sex and I proceed to acquired a "KIG"(affair) but subsequently broke off the relationship cos I felt damm bloody guilty for that and now I have to content to "PCC".

I really agreed that once your lady is pregant, she will gradually lose interest in sex and all she is concern is about the child and hence neglecting the "sex part". So a lot of men will take it as an excuse to flirt outside but I must say that we men have ourselves to blame for the "CHAO CHU"(ti ko).

[free]

I suppose one of the biggest trade-off will be a less tight vagina. How much of the original tightness will be retained after childbirth? I know exercise helps but still things will never be the same again?

[thaivisitor]

I suppose one of the biggest trade-off will be a less tight vagina. How much of the original tightness will be retained after childbirth? I know exercise helps but still things will never be the same again?
There is actually a solution for that, a product to "tighten" the vagina but let's not talk about that as I don't want to be zapped for advertising.

thaivisitor
Thaivisitor’s Annual Samsters Trip to Hatyai!
GL Lor 10 Coffeeshop TCSS Session On 1 March 2005

[t123]

I took a cab 6 months ago, the cabby told me that he frequent a massage palour in Balestier because his wife never willingly have sex with him after the birth of their only son. Even on bed after he cum, his wife immediately get on with her chores. He chose to drive night shift to be able to go for massage during breaks. He enjoyed to be power vacuum by the girl.

[Cheri_Popper]

I suppose one of the biggest trade-off will be a less tight vagina. How much of the original tightness will be retained after childbirth? I know exercise helps but still things will never be the same again?


When my wife gave birth, the doctor asked me whether I want to "sew" it up!

I was not sure what he meant by that, he told me that it is a procedure to "tighten" up the vagina!

[sunny302]

From my own experience after 20+ yrs of marriage, I believe Communication in the key here as its the essence to bonding a solid relationship; be it b4 or after marriage.

When two ppl share a common wavelength and talk to one another, many things can resolve...be it sex or any other problems that one may have in their daily life. Cheers! :)

[coolpix2075]

From my own experience after 20+ yrs of marriage, I believe Communication in the key here as its the essence to bonding a solid relationship; be it b4 or after marriage.

When two ppl share a common wavelength and talk to one another, many things can resolve...be it sex or any other problems that one may have in their daily life. Cheers! :)

truely agreed wif u bro sunny302. it's the communication tat counts... afterall we have to thank our spouses for baring us the children as it is never ez to give birth. Afterall it might not be so tight there but there are many ways to compensate for good sex if both parties are willing to explore further... juz my 2 cents of opinion...

[tittyhawk]

From my own experience after 20+ yrs of marriage, I believe Communication in the key here as its the essence to bonding a solid relationship; be it b4 or after marriage.

When two ppl share a common wavelength and talk to one another, many things can resolve...be it sex or any other problems that one may have in their daily life. Cheers! :)

I share the same views..

[stephenL]

Thaivisitor bro,
I'm married with one kid....after birth of our kid, we hired a maid to look after her and she sleep in the same room as the maid, so there's no problem with sex after marriage,infact we are of high sex drive...as the maid went off after two years, my kid sleep in the same room with us.
Inorder to keep our sex live active, we do it after our kid slept and we make a point that our kid sleep around 9pm. that will give us amber time to prepare for activities at night...
Yes, I knew of some married woman who shun sex after birth, that's post natal syndrome..it can be cure by ...the husband must take the initiative to talk it over with wifey or do some romantic activities after the kids had slept.
It's always a tired life after marriage...cos you dun get to sleep early and you can't do it early...
:)

[stephenL]

Bangkok Master,
Well, if you read enuf, you can have sex with wifey when she is up to 6 mth pregnant, I do that too when wifey is pregnant from begining to 8 mth pregnant and wifey enjoy it, you had to be carefull not to thrust too hard, the onli safe position is doggy style.

[stephenL]

Cheri popper bro,
When my wifey give birth, I was there to witness the birth of my baby girl...and the doctoer did sew it up, yes it does tighten the vagina.

[Rof|maoxz]

B4 married, 4 x sex per wk. After married 4 x sex per mth. I think working + family chores somehow affecting married life man.

[stephenL]

tired is one thing, survey show that those who have sex regularly lives longer,
after marriage we still do it 4 x per week even though i'm tired, but it boost up the system.

[Rof|maoxz]

有心无力 :(

Rof|maoxz

[stephenL]

it's natural birth for my kid, as you shld know, the vagina is consists of several muscles that can be expand and contract...no doubt my wifey feel the pain when my kid head pop out, the sewing is to sew back any tear of the vagina wall during birth.

[sunny302]

I think working + family chores somehow affecting married life man.

I have a friend whose marriage nearly broke down due to work + family stresses. He was lucky that he got help and managed to get his life back on track after speaking to a Counselor. The cause of the breakdon...lack of communication between the two of them as they were not mentallyrepared for the responsibilities that come with marriage life.

we still do it 4 x per week even though i'm tired, but it boost up the system.

Good for u bro!...as having a healthy sex life after marriage is the essence to further cementing the roots of marriage.

[stephenL]

Yes, bro sunny302, marriage life is not a bed of roses for the wifey too...it's a torny path ahead....(rose is with torn) lot's of sacrified and time management, many couples had jump into it thinking that it is a very blissfull life, but after the kids come along, your life change...for better or worst it's all depend on how you managed your marriage life.
I have seen a few marriage that broke down due to fault of both parties, the hubby goes cheonging and left the wifey at home, wifey found out and cold war began...no communication, only sms thru hp...sighz...and they end up divorced..worst, hubby accused wifey having affairs cos she used to work late..that's not for us to discuss.

[Cheri_Popper]

Brother, I was there also!! Is't it a must to sew when its a natural birth.???
I saw doctor snip to enable baby to come out and stitch the cut!
:confused: Is Bro Cheri referring to another Stitching to tighten the vagina??

Well according to what I know, the "sewing" is not bcos of snipping to enable to allwo the baby to come out but to retighten the vigina!

Although it is sewed back, it was not as tight as it use to be! :(

[ahbengsony]

after the kids come along, your life change...for better or worst it's all depend on how you managed your marriage life.
I have seen a few marriage that broke down due to fault of both parties, the hubby goes cheonging and left the wifey at home, wifey found out and cold war began...no communication, only sms thru hp...sighz...and they end up divorced..worst, hubby accused wifey having affairs cos she used to work late..that's not for us to discuss.[/QUOTE]
----
It is happening to me now but only stage two but have not reach stage three yet. . i think i talk more to the maid than my wife. Ever since the arrival of the two boys four months ago, i have had three times only ? :(

[wankmehappy]

From my own experience after 20+ yrs of marriage, I believe Communication in the key here as its the essence to bonding a solid relationship; be it b4 or after marriage.

When two ppl share a common wavelength and talk to one another, many things can resolve...be it sex or any other problems that one may have in their daily life. Cheers! :)
yesss....rise my hands & legs to agree on what you say....communication is very important....it will lead to trust & believing....both party will know what their daily needs....communicaton make wonders...
happyme :D

[kingcopa]

Definately man! My gf is expecting our first child and she's about 5 months pregant and we had not had sex for the last 3 months due to the fact that she heard from someone mentioning that it might affect the head of the baby. So I "lan lan" never got to bonk her for the last 3 months, luckily she knows that I'm a high sex drive person so she allows me to go for commercial sex and I proceed to acquired a "KIG"(affair) but subsequently broke off the relationship cos I felt damm bloody guilty for that and now I have to content to "PCC".

I really agreed that once your lady is pregant, she will gradually lose interest in sex and all she is concern is about the child and hence neglecting the "sex part". So a lot of men will take it as an excuse to flirt outside but I must say that we men have ourselves to blame for the "CHAO CHU"(ti ko).


I agree w u hands down. My wife giving birth soon. I have not touch her for abt 7mth!!!!!!! overall during her pregancy, we do it only 3 times!!!!!!!!!!!! most of the time is i pcc while reading the forum. I cannot imagine what my sex life will be after givin birth

[sunny302]

Ever since the arrival of the two boys four months ago, i have had three times only ? :(

Bro...don't be sad....just try to have better com wif the misses and I'm sure she will recriprocate wif time..cheers :D

[sunny302]

I cannot imagine what my sex life will be after givin birth

Bro kingcopa,

Just make sure u take care of the missses as woman tends to go into depression after her delivery(post-natal blues). Wif u supporting & understanding her needs during this crucial period,I'm sure your marriage life will improve further & move into another milestone...cheers :)

[stephenL]

Yes, u guys had to go on night shift after she had give birth....let her rest and you do the feeding and changing of diapers for the newborn. That's wat i do when my wifey is on confinement..but real tired as you know u had to get up in the middle of the night to feed baby...change diapers....and next day you had to work in the office hours..But it is worth it as my daughter is abt 5 yrs now and i see the result of bringing her up...there's no replacement for bringing up a child....

[HuiGe3387]

Well, I am married with 2 kids between the age of 6-8. Both of them sleep in the same room as me & wifey citing "afraid of the dark" reason!

What I will do is that sometimes I sneaked back from the office in the afternoon to have a "quickie" as both my kids then are in school! :D

If not, wait till they are sound asleep before doing "it" in the bathroom!

I am married with a boy 8 years old now and he squeeze in between my wifey and I on the queen size bed, citing the same reason "afraid of dark". When he is sound asleep, we will try different stunts as quietly as we can .......

[thaivisitor]

When my son was born in Phayao, I wasn't there as I was working. But when I was there and saw my son, who was then 7 days old, I swear to God he was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my whole damn life.

While he was an infant, sex with my wife was not a problem since my stepson slept with his grandmother in the other room and my son doesn’t cry in the night. But when my mother in law passed away, my 2 sons now sleep in the same room as us, with my younger son (5 years old) in between me and my wife, while my elder son (10 years old) sleeps on the floor.

We couldn't really make love in the night while both of them are sleeping as the movements and sound would probably wake them up and I sure won't want them to see me and my wife in a 69 position. This situation is now actually a blessing in disguise for us and in fact our love-making sessions have even improved.

Since my working hours is control by me, I now have love-making sessions with my wife in the mornings or afternoons about 2 to 3 times a week whenever I’m in Hatyai (I traveled out often). After sending my 2 sons to school, my wife and I would go for breakfast together since it’s more economical than cooking at home. Back at home, we would take our bath together and of course during bath, there’s always foreplay. We would then proceed to the bed and without any interruption, can enjoy ourselves for a couple of hours, thereafter, just relax together lying in bed.

On those days when we are not making love and I am free in the morning, we would spend lying on the couch together watching VCDs which will be about 2 hours too. So I can really say that for me, having kids has actually improved our sex live together.

Only one potential problem has arises,… that is my wife has just discovered that she’s pregnant again and is having morning sickness, kekeke :D


thaivisitor
Thaivisitor’s Annual Samsters Trip to Hatyai!
GL Lor 10 Coffeeshop TCSS Session On 1 March 2005

[wankmehappy]

Only one potential problem has arises,… that is my wife has just discovered that she’s pregnant again and is having morning sickness, kekeke :D


thaivisitor
Thaivisitor’s Annual Samsters Trip to Hatyai!
GL Lor 10 Coffeeshop TCSS Session On 1 March 2005
bro TV, congra for that....it a happy problem afterall...
happyme :D

[thaivisitor]

bro TV, congra for that....it a happy problem afterall...
happyme :D
Actually was "trying" for the past few months as my "master" advised me to have a family nucleus of 5 members which is the ideal for harmony. :D

thaivisitor
Thaivisitor’s Annual Samsters Trip to Hatyai!
GL Lor 10 Coffeeshop TCSS Session On 1 March 2005

[stephenL]

Thaivisitor bro,
congratulation, another phase of working towards your sex life with so many kids around..really admire your time management...well as in sg, I had to take time off or go on leave and book a hotel room and enjoy the whole day with wifey.....doing what we wanted to do...

[darylcch]

before having me kid, we have sex everyday..if not..every weekend..now we have kid, she gives me reason that...she is only interested just after her period..there's the time when she got drive...what to do...if I missed that few days..will have to wait for the next month..

[PKTM]

Bro... totally 110% agree with you. Spot on. Guess that is why alot of them opt for ops instead of natural birth.

Kind of difficult to tell her, you must execise becos yr CB loose!!! :p

Bro, use medical terms to scare them... tell her if u dun exercise, very high chance to get urinary incontinence, especially when old age!!! It will definitely work. :D