The one you marry, is not the one you loved most?

[jonah11]

Originally Posted by JWNY

In my honest opinion, this is not a healthy sign, long term. Who deosn't want to make love most to that special someone rather than someone else? You should try to remedy this bro...slowly

Is she apprehensive or...?

JWNY

I am now in a mix..... Dunno how to remedy.....

Nope. She is not apprehensive. But during courtship, it seems that she is more assertive than me, ie she is the one that proposes more dates than me? Like now, she keeps telling me that a lot of people asking when we are tying the know......

Some of my friends saw her and they say that she is a good woman but beware of her temperament.

Then one day it came to my knowledge that one of my acquaintances was her cousin and he confirmed my fears.

We spoke about her temperament during the early courtship days. It improve a lot after that but can see that it is there lah.

I am the one who is apprehensive in that one day if we get married, she will turn back to her bad temper and maybe even worse. Since we are married, we are in short being tied down already.

I do not know what to do.......

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Originally Posted by jonah11

I am the one who is apprehensive in that one day if we get married, she will turn back to her bad temper and maybe even worse. Since we are married, we are in short being tied down already.

I do not know what to do.......

bro,what i can suggest is u two find an opportunity,find a nice place sit down and talk abt it.pour out all ur concerns,let her knw what u r thinking and what can be done to improve the rship.same thing,allow her to tell u what she is thinking.frm there work out a few feasible solutions to see what can de done.A rship involves 2 parties,there is absolutely nth u can do by urself.hope this wrks for u two.

[JWNY]

Originally Posted by jonah11

I do not know what to do.......

If you are not ready, it is your responsibility to tell her. Don't fret about making her sad...because 1 heart broken for now...is better than 2 or more (kids) in the future.

Do you love her?

Do you see her temper as a major barrier, ie - can you overlook it?

You may not be ready now..but later on, still, you must be honest with YOURSELF first...then her

Don't worry bro...many here willing to help you

JWNY

[jonah11]

Originally Posted by JWNY

If you are not ready, it is your responsibility to tell her. Don't fret about making her sad...because 1 heart broken for now...is better than 2 or more (kids) in the future.

Do you love her?

Do you see her temper as a major barrier, ie - can you overlook it?

You may not be ready now..but later on, still, you must be honest with YOURSELF first...then her

Don't worry bro...many here willing to help you

JWNY

Thanks bro and all bros here. I really appreciate it very much.

That is part of the reason why I reduce my postings in this forum.

Sometimes not happy lah if u know what I mean.

Her temper can be a major barrier esp she is the sort of person that wants things her way.

Love her? Well, I love her and am grateful to her for things she done for me. Sometimes I beginning to wonder whether she is doing all these for me so that I can marry her. Will she stop these things after we get married?

I got a feeling that she is doing all these things for me now. It may be temporal. How I know? I look at the way she treats her parents and know how bad and stingy she can be with them.

Btw, I know the parents before I knew her. Both her parents are very good friends with me.

[jon2000sg]

Originally Posted by Shuang_Jie_Gun

i realised the fact too that life is short so we need to enjoy as much as we can but eventually i do stop and ask myself where is this bringing me to?Spiritual or sexual enlightment?i believe the latter would be more appropriate.perhaps it's time to step on the brakes and do smth more meaningful to my life.

something more meaningful means settling down and tying the knot; and give birth to a few new lives???

so that's life?

life is all but all about money, esp in SG

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Originally Posted by jon2000sg

something more meaningful means settling down and tying the knot; and give birth to a few new lives???

so that's life?

life is all but all about money, esp in SG

that might be one of the means but that is not in my mind at the moment.Life is what u make it up from.Life to each and every individual differs.

[jon2000sg]

since this is a forum, hope you can share your views of your life philosophy

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Originally Posted by jonah11

Love her? Well, I love her and am grateful to her for things she done for me. Sometimes I beginning to wonder whether she is doing all these for me so that I can marry her. Will she stop these things after we get married?

I got a feeling that she is doing all these things for me now. It may be temporal. How I know? I look at the way she treats her parents and know how bad and stingy she can be with them.

there is always 2 sides to a coin,she may be as gd before marriage and worse after that,have it ever occured to u she might be better?anyway,things are hard to say,it all boils down to whether are u able to accept her no matter what she becomes.so longer she dont overdo it,it should be ok.

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Originally Posted by jon2000sg

since this is a forum, hope you can share your views of your life philosophy

ermm bro are u referring to myself or?sorry if i sound a bit lost today..hee..

[jon2000sg]

Originally Posted by Shuang_Jie_Gun

ermm bro are u referring to myself or?sorry if i sound a bit lost today..hee..

to you lah, you seem like someone well read and knowledgable; pls share lah, thank you bro

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Originally Posted by jon2000sg

to you lah, you seem like someone well read and knowledgable; pls share lah, thank you bro

wah bro,u see me too up liao,i am just gd at crapping.someone who used to cheong and leave my heart all over the place.i used to have a thread "Falling in love with KTV girls" which have all my foolish love games over them.as for what i shared here is my life experience with my last ex of 3 yrs.she taught me what is love and how to love and she is the only one whom can make me understand how it felt to be really loved and cared for.i am the happy-go-lucky kind of guy,i try not to expect much cos i also believe in the higher the expectation,the greater the disappointment will be.i am a guy who can be very easily contended if the right one comes along.

[Malaysian Datuk]

Originally Posted by Shuang_Jie_Gun

yeah man,if we were to bring in the "what ifs" we can start a brand new story again.

Bro if you bring in the "what ifs" then never ending already.....if you have seen the movie 'Sliding Doors' (starring Gwyneth Paltrow) or even 'The Buttery Effect' (starring Aston Kusher) then you'll know what I mean and you end up pondering if there could have been alternate outcomes.....for me whenever I hear George Michael's 'A Different Corner' over the radio, it will trigger me asking myself what could have been (I think this is a line from a Tiffany or Debbie Gibson's song)

[toothbrush]

Originally Posted by Malaysian Datuk

Bro if you bring in the "what ifs" then never ending already.....

Like what u always tell me, "just do it" worried later, at least it would reduce the possibility of thinking "if i have done it".

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Originally Posted by Malaysian Datuk

Bro if you bring in the "what ifs" then never ending already.....

thats y after much thoughts i decide to drop the "what ifs".too much pain for the bros here to discuss them abt.hee~

[Malaysian Datuk]

Originally Posted by toothbrush

Like what u always tell me, "just do it" worried later, at least it would reduce the possibility of thinking "if i have done it".

You taking it out of context bro....Now dealing with "the one you LOVE may not be one you MARRY".....we talking about profound issues like LOVE & MARRAIGE here....
The NIKE slogan apply only when dealing with LUST, SEX, CARNAL PLEASURES etc.....please dun distort my teachings