Do you still wanna bonk your wife?

[samyboys]

Originally Posted by PepperO

Hi Bro samyboys,

Well... to start with, I am not one who would refuse ML with my HB. In fact, I have to initiate it most of the time. So, it is highly unlikely that he would "feel the same" (as in, feel the same kind of frustration) and start looking outside.

In the event that he gets 'bored' anyway and does look outside, I hope he has the sense and courtesy to 'wipe his mouth' before coming home to me. What I don't know, won't hurt me.

In the worst case that he does get caught and I get to know, well, then... how do you think I should feel?

its quite rare to find guys that are turned off with sex.
had u try to find out why he is not keen in bed?

i do agree, sometimes what men do outside, as long as he do not bring problems back home is good enough. whether u managed to discover it will be a different issue

[RayCom]

Originally Posted by catch71

Bros and Sis,

Just out of curiosity, any of you having problems communicating with your partner? My wife is highly strung, and everyday when we get home, there is always something that is not right and that would set her into a fit... be it the neighbour doing reno work and dirtying our yard, someone parking their cars and blocking our driveway, kiddo leaving his toys and not keeping them... whatever, there is always a reason for her to be unhappy... and i am aways at the rec'g end. I usu give in, cos otherwise, she gets emotional and starts crying.

but at night, when she has calmed down, she wants sex, but i cannot even stand the sight of her, cos 2 hours ago, she was shouting at me and showing me those 25 cent face.. and i will avoid getting close to her, much less touch her... i think she react wo thinking, but after that she dun let it bother her, whereas i react slowly, but the anger linger a little longer...

just wondering if any of you have the same problem??

Bro, I agree with you. I almost same suitiation . I dunno why but can you imagine like sex crazy when 2 hrs ago quarrell like hell, how to do it .For me , even 2 days ago quarrel I also find it hard to have sex. have to have mood mah but somehow the gals only know to have mood for themself but think man are like animals anytime also can.I still love my wife but its more towards family type of love already not the wan to f*** her every night kind of thing . sometimes really lor, very difficult to jaggle between fb and wife. so i keep it to one each week hahaha

[PepperO]

Originally Posted by samyboys

its quite rare to find guys that are turned off with sex.
had u try to find out why he is not keen in bed?

It is not that he is turned off with sex, bro... it's just that my sex drive is higher..

[JusWannaCum]

Hey Bro SinDellman, its heart wrenching to see how many similarities there are in your story to my life now.

Unfortunately, we were never lucky enough to have gone thru the

Originally Posted by SinDellman

will just bonk, sleep, eat, bonk, etc......

stage. We struggled to consummate our marriage during our 1st year as she was always complaining about pain. I really thought I kena a Lemon and was beginning to look for the "return with full refund if not satisfied clause". So the sex has never been really good from the beginning. I wonder which is worse, to have tasted the good life once and reminisce of the good old times or to have not known it at all and to live in the hope that it will come one day.

Originally Posted by SinDellman

Suddenly, one fine night, we kanna rejected. We lost face, but in the end, wifey give way to our bonk on that night. We felt lost, and was rather surprised but we thought it was a one off thingy. Then another night, another rejection, and another, and it became like you are always begging to get that bonk. Bonking became less and less frequent, you get confused, you lost interest in work, life, etc.... Every night you came back, you can feel that she is rejecting you when both are in bed. It became so meaningless to even wanting to give a hint to wifey. So you started staying late at the computer, or watching late TV, MSN, chatroom, looking for some kind female souls to tc. Your mood is at the moody stage, friends and everyone tell you so when you are in the office.

However, your wifey behave differently. During daytime and when you are with her in other company, family, relatives, she can behave like nothing is wrong, and she even can be rather physical close in front of everyone. But everything change when both are in bed!

Originally Posted by samyboys

i am just like what u described in BOLD, rather go to the room to sleep when she's already in dream land because u have no expectations from her but just to sleep.

This is so true for me. Its 230am now and wifey is sleeping in the bed next my table now as I write. Snoring away and I have no urge or desire to go to bed.... sigh...

Originally Posted by SinDellman

As for me, I struggle for at least 3 or 4 years, thinking of how to bridge our love again, because I was losing interest in her, and physically having no interest to be near her. However, was not in the game to cheat her either, no FL, no girlfriend, etc.... just pcc everytime when i feel the need. My mind was going crazy, especially finding life becoming totally meaningless, having to work hard for $$ for family and having a no sex lifestyle. Divorce or having a fb was never the answer.

So its takes about 3 to 4 years of soul searching to finally come to a decision.. Hmmm...

I am of the same opinion that divorce or having a fb/gf/mistress is not an option. The financial consequences of a divorce are mind boggling.. FLs seem like a very good compromise. As I have read many Brothers saying, Pay & Play.

Its ironical that sex is suppose to be a sanctity of marriage, yet many men are not able to get it from their life partners and have to look outside for satisfaction.

If only sex could be viewed as acceptably as another social sport like golf or mahjong. So that if your spouse does not want to golf with you this weekend, its ok to golf with your buddies. Or like your weekly mahjong sessions with your usual kakis are never questioned.

Just want to say thanks to SinDellman for sharing.

This forum is great in that it gives us all an avenue to vent through our anonymous nicks, for those who dare to register and post. I am sure that for the many Samsters who are in similar situations, there 100 times more men outwith this forum who experience the same torment.
I cannot imagine what my regular mates would say if I were to share with them the shit I am going thru and desires to cross over to the Dark Side.

Originally Posted by SinDellman

Believe me, it is NOT that easy or possible to communicate with our WOMEN on such matter! When you are in our shoes, you will know.

...seems like I am reading my life story as it is about to unfold..

[ch18]

Go to the room to sleep when she's already in dream land because u have no expectations from her but just to sleep.

Sigh.... My daily routine as well.....

[samyboys]

mine couldn't be more of a 'dead' fish, needs sleep more than sex

[narrah]

Answer : Yes.

Do I get to, as often as I want? No.

Like most others here; before children, was a lot more likely;

after first, dropped off even tho v had mother in law help to take care of child at night, after 3 months, plus help at home.

after second, dropped off to once a month or less.. went for 3+ years once without...

Now : very occasional; more often, do self service; occasionally go HC or FL.
Wife was the first person I had sex with; never tried outside during the first 10 years of our relationship... and even now - I'd rather not eat out, but sometimes....

[samyboys]

guess men suffers from sex drought after marriage, esp after children

[kingken]

Ans is yes also..
but after our 1 child, sex decrease to 3-4 times a month or just 1 a week..
Previously we can have sex 2-3 times a week...

[kingken]

Originally Posted by samyboys

mine couldn't be more of a 'dead' fish, needs sleep more than sex

agree sia!!! she wanna sleep more than wan sex nowadays!!

[kingrex]

Last bonk my wife... 3 yrs back... Guess we are both too busy to discuss such topics anymore..

[mandom]

Originally Posted by kingrex

Last bonk my wife... 3 yrs back... Guess we are both too busy to discuss such topics anymore..

That's interesting....the conventional wisdom is that a marriage with prolonged lack of sex could be due to some underlying relationship problem - could this be your situation? Or really just due to lack of time, too busy etc?

So having sex with wife like once a month is quite ok huh?

[TCH1975]

My Sex life with Wife dropped tremendously. Now about 1 time in 2 to 3 months...approximate 4-5 times a year. We are now only age 34yrs. The feeling is like "wah lao" doing another job. Wanted to marry those Sexy one - scare she will run away with other cock. Marry a faithful wife - Sex life becomes dull. Jealous those bro in forum who marry both sexy n faithful wife.

[adrx]

Originally Posted by TCH1975

My Sex life with Wife dropped tremendously. Now about 1 time in 2 to 3 months...approximate 4-5 times a year. We are now only age 34yrs. The feeling is like "wah lao" doing another job. Wanted to marry those Sexy one - scare she will run away with other cock. Marry a faithful wife - Sex life becomes dull. Jealous those bro in forum who marry both sexy n faithful wife.

both are 34 only...
how to survive till aged??

how many kids u have?? i have 1 and sex life suddenly dies off... but its back again.. slowly build back.... and i'm same age as u...

'dig' a thread start by me.... and i rekindle the 'sex' life via communications...

now, my wife scare to wear bikini.. cos after 1 kid.. her slim figure gone 'off'... and we are squeezing time for jogging or other forms of exercising...

dont give out..cos we are still young to deprive from sex

[digdug]

I've been married over 16 years already and despite eating out sometimes, me & wife still do it at least twice a month. Sometimes even more. Last week - 3 times.