Need Help On How To Make My Wife Sexually Active?

[Anel King]

Originally Posted by Urbane

Maybe you can try to groom yourself ? Get into fitness activities, take more care on how you look, things that makes guys more attractive.

She will notice it and think that maybe you are eating on the outside. She may then pay more attention to you and be more accomodating towards you. It's a good passive aggressive method.

Well Bro

I have recently started to work out in California Fitness with a trainer. Will see the result in 2 months time.

Hopefully it works.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Originally Posted by sgiceboy

wah bro

@ least u did have sex after yr first child.

for my case hor... alreadi 3 yrs NO SEX liao...

everyday see porn & DIY.... or else how to relieve pressure.....

take it easy...lor.. live each day as it passes....

Bro

Hopefully I don't end up like you, but I sympathize with you as I know what you are going through.

But seriously 3 years is too long liow. I think would ended up in GL or HC already if i was you.

But hang in there bro if you can.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Originally Posted by cereal-killer

Let me guess, She's Not Working .... and you don't have maid.

if it is, then "most likely" she is just toooo stressed up handling two kids
plus they are like 2 years apart ?

You need to take the load off her, you need to come back and fill that gap during the evening. Bond with your children and get close to her again and every thing should be fine.

Its gonna take awhile, but my guess is, you're going to loose heart and go back FL or GL again.

Actually bro not really.

Yes she is not working.

But we have alot of help. We live in my parents house with them and my brother & his wife. We have 2 maids. 1 helps to take care of the kids, even sometimes when the younger one wakes up in the middle of the night. My in-laws leave 1 lane away from our house. so no shortage of helping hands.

I usually come back by 6.45 have dinner and play with the kids till 9. I will shower my older one and change her in to her pajamas and make her milk. My wife feeds her and put her to sleep. My second one will be taken care of by the maid.

Only one problem i have is my snoring. so i sleep in the next room so that I don't disturb my wife & kids sleep. We have had sex with my older one sleeping on the same bed.(When trying to have my second one)

Hopefully since now i am going to the gym, i will loose weight and bring down my snoring so that i can sleep in the same room again to increase my chances of loving her.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Originally Posted by Drooler

Bro i totally understand how you feel cos i was in the same predicament.Try having a talk with your wife, you are both adults. originally i had difficulty coping as well, stress built up then frustration. decided then to speak to my wife and got green light to get my 'release' she understands that men need sex......and paid sex is nothing but a transaction.

If however one day should i get into an affair and feelings are involved then i will be at fault.

Take it easy and try to do as one of the bro's suggested, the get fit method. cos
1) you need that fitness anyways to handle your kids
2) you will feel good about yourself
3) women are like that, they say looks dont matter but in the end, if they see a hunk, they will still take a second glance.

Good luck dude.

Hi Bro

i didn't catch the 1st part of when your wife gave you the green light. Did she allow you to screw in GL/HC?

The Second part about affairs, I agree 100%

Last part, I am already working on it in progress. And i agree that you might be right?

Reagrds
Anel King

[samyboys]

Originally Posted by tigerprawn

Reality of life. Common problem that is why a lot of married guys patronise FL or have affairs. Especially in this case where it is not that you got sick of fcking your wife but more cos she lost interest in sex and performing it more as a duty. Bro, realistically you may end up on your old habits again if this carries on, but please just play safe outside for the wellbeing of your family.

i guess at times, woman knows woman best.
that is why FLs are here to fill the void.
i feel it difficult to work it out with the other half as she will have more than enough 'reasons' to silence you.

so if u really need to outsource, do it safely

[samyboys]

Originally Posted by Drooler

Bro i totally understand how you feel cos i was in the same predicament.Try having a talk with your wife, you are both adults. originally i had difficulty coping as well, stress built up then frustration. decided then to speak to my wife and got green light to get my 'release' she understands that men need sex......and paid sex is nothing but a transaction.

If however one day should i get into an affair and feelings are involved then i will be at fault.

Take it easy and try to do as one of the bro's suggested, the get fit method. cos
1) you need that fitness anyways to handle your kids
2) you will feel good about yourself
3) women are like that, they say looks dont matter but in the end, if they see a hunk, they will still take a second glance.

Good luck dude.

some clean and fit advise here.

however i feel most woman do not know how often a man needs to release

[samyboys]

Anel King


I guess your faithfulness do not equals to intimacy from your wife.
Well if that is the case, try out what some brothers are advising you here and see how it goes. If nothing change, then u need to change.

Sometimes woman see faithfulness as a duty and not in exchange for intimacy.


Good luck

[brother69]

Bro, bring yr wife to a pub. Hv some drinks, talk to other girls in the pub infront of her. She lost her wildness after the marriage n kids. U need to spur her ups....U dress smart n she dress sexy......after a few drinks n touch her once a while......she will be on fire....enjoy

[Anel King]

Originally Posted by samyboys

Anel King

I guess your faithfulness do not equals to intimacy from your wife.
Well if that is the case, try out what some brothers are advising you here and see how it goes. If nothing change, then u need to change.

Sometimes woman see faithfulness as a duty and not in exchange for intimacy.

Good luck

Well bro

I have started th change by going to the gym to loose some weight and beer up the muscles to get her attracted to me again.

If that fails, i wont let all the hard work go down the drain. i'll show off my bod to ladies who like it.

But i am giving myself till end of the year with her.

Don't get me wrong. She is a great wife to be with. A wonderful mother to my kids. But our communication is screwed sometimes as we aren't intimide as i would want to be.

Honestly guys, I'm sure Many bro who have been hung dry and not have sex for a few weeks or months, tend to be unable to concentrate in work and be always on a short fuse. But always put up a false face of everything is alright.

I am going through that now. the last 2 or 3 months my work has been & still is suffering as concentration is damn low.

All i need, of every man needs is 1 or 2 good love sessions a week, then all problems can be solved. I dare to think even divorce rates will fall. Cause there will be no more tension, more communication and openness in the relationship.

But am going to continue to work hard, in the gym also, to keep the fire in my marriage before taking the next drastic step.

Regards
Anel King

[eeemen]

Originally Posted by Anel King

Well bro

........................

But am going to continue to work hard, in the gym also, to keep the fire in my marriage before taking the next drastic step.

Regards
Anel King

Good luck bro, all the best! Cheers .........

[Anel King]

Originally Posted by brother69

Bro, bring yr wife to a pub. Hv some drinks, talk to other girls in the pub infront of her. She lost her wildness after the marriage n kids. U need to spur her ups....U dress smart n she dress sexy......after a few drinks n touch her once a while......she will be on fire....enjoy

Bro, thats and interesting idea.

Let me beef up the muscles in the gym 1st. Then i bring her to pubbing. get her jealous with all the girls coming to me then i will make her hot.

Good idea. but need to take abit of time to get there 1st.

Regards
Anel King

[The_Chef]

Keep fit, bro!

[hotspurs]

hi all. I guess this is a common issue for many bros considering numerous similar threads now and in the past. I have been married 10 yrs and have a 6 yo daughter. we hardly have sex, maybe 1-2 times a month many times when we do, she does it grudgingly, make me feel a begger. Sometimes i just fantasize about another girl and pump away or I just walk away. Things got quite bad as I resented her and would give her the cold shouler treatment. sometimes I get paranoid at times thinking she may be fucking around outside.
but I soon "saw the light". if she does not want sex and I need, just go find FL, fuck and pay up. for the past few years, I have been regular to HCs, KTVs, FLs. My thinking very simple - play, fuck whatever then at 6pm sharp, I go back to my wife & kid and we have dinner, shopping etc. This way, everybody happy. My wife not pressured and I don't resent her anymore. I find my mood much lighter since then and I enjoy my family time better. Although sex is important to me, my wife is an excellent mother, works hard to bring home $ too, respects my parents etc all these are impt in marriage too.

[analicious]

Originally Posted by Anel King

Hi Bro & Sis of SBF

I've been married for 4 1/2 years now. Before marriage I was active in Geylang and HC's almost every month 1 or 2 times. ONS also once in 1 month.

When I was dating my wife stop everything in Geylang & HC's. Only maximum was sucked her nipples, which surprised me as she was conservativebut she was the one who initiated it.

After marriage, we had sex almost every other day till our 1st child. During the 9 months, she didn’t allow me to even finger her below. 4 months after our 1st child we had sex. I was like a caged animal let loose. But we only had sex 1 a month.

Last year was out 3rd anniversary we had decent sex. The next 3 months we only had once a month till April she confirmed she was pregnant again. Again I got hung dry and DIY from April last year till 2 weeks ago.

Looks like I still won’t have sex whenever I want to cause she like not so interested to even start anything. But once we start, she wants to finish fast. And only missionary, from 1st day to today.

No matter what I try to tell her or what I do, she only what to have when she is ok and only in missionary, nothing else.

I don't want to head back to my old play grounds as that will tear the family apart. I am only a regular for JG in the Tuina shop in CV.

Was wondering if any experience bros & sis can advice.

Regards
Anel King

Hi bro i'm going through what you are going through and i tot my 3 weeks was bad but your's 3 years Even now i'm feeling bored of releasing on my own.
Same like you dont wish to go back to the old hunt.

Anyway i'm new here noe nothing abt this site until saw my friend log in and was surprised there such a site in sg but i like what i see now i'm into reading the stories here to pass time and forget abt going back to the old hunt .

Seriously the the story telling part . Now more into reading abt it rather than doing it .

Cheers everybody.

[samyboys]

Originally Posted by Anel King

Well bro

I have started th change by going to the gym to loose some weight and beer up the muscles to get her attracted to me again.

If that fails, i wont let all the hard work go down the drain. i'll show off my bod to ladies who like it.

But i am giving myself till end of the year with her.

Don't get me wrong. She is a great wife to be with. A wonderful mother to my kids. But our communication is screwed sometimes as we aren't intimide as i would want to be.

Honestly guys, I'm sure Many bro who have been hung dry and not have sex for a few weeks or months, tend to be unable to concentrate in work and be always on a short fuse. But always put up a false face of everything is alright.

I am going through that now. the last 2 or 3 months my work has been & still is suffering as concentration is damn low.

All i need, of every man needs is 1 or 2 good love sessions a week, then all problems can be solved. I dare to think even divorce rates will fall. Cause there will be no more tension, more communication and openness in the relationship.

But am going to continue to work hard, in the gym also, to keep the fire in my marriage before taking the next drastic step.

Regards
Anel King

u have a fairly reasonable time frame to see if its worth your efforts.

i tested my other half reaction earlier by relating some reasons quoted here why intimacy dies after marriage, esp after with kids as i am somehow in such a situation too.

my other half response was fast and defensive, "not happy can go outside eat, just don't get caught, everything takes 2 hands to clap" was her immediate replies.

after some discussion here and there, i could feel the topic was going no where and its just a finger pointing game, guys point at ladies, they point back. claiming housework, kids and two main reasons for draining them out. unless these chores are taken care of my maid, she got time to go shopping and do what she likes, she can be more physically available. else mentally and physically drained, no way she is into sex.
else men all the same, only wants sex from a 'tired woman' and never contribute to help.

for me case, at times i do help out to balance out the running of a household, but can never be within her expectations, so i have chosen at times to wash my hands of certain chores. just like she has her way with the kid, she will 'complain' about the way i take care of the kid. the kid as a result side with her more as a result.

in conclusion, i feel such intimacy decline happens in most married with children situation. most woman do not really look deep enough to work things out. they expect us to share work load with them in exchange for intimacy, which i feel is wrong. workload and intimacy should not be bundled together. and maybe men are also more physical animals compared to women who are more emotional and mental type.

live and let live - i would seek my own solutions than to be feeling disappointed and allow my happiness to be controlled by others/situation
we adjust ourselves to the environment and not expect it the other way round