The one you marry, is not the one you loved most?

[Reaper]

Marriage is only about 2 things;

1. To ensure the continued existence of the Human Species.
2. Compromise.....

[qw2op]

Originally Posted by JWNY

You may have married

- a one night stand
- a fling
- a wife or girlfriend of a buddy / best friend
- childhood sweetheart
- your boss / colleague
- a cousin
- matchmaked
- etc, etc

.....but is that person the one you loved most?

must it b u love most?

can u marry sum1 u love much or more?

if u dun like sum1, do u think u can bear 2 b wif dat person evryday 4 ze rest of ur life?

how often do u manage 2 get ze things dat u want 2 hv?

how often does life turn out ze way u want it 2 b?

humans r not perfect wor ... can their life b perfect? ... can dey choose 2 hv a perfect life?

[adnex]

Hmmm.. There is a saying in life not many of us will marry the one we love but we must love the one we marry. hmmm

[JWNY]

Hope everyone is enjoying the holidays and thank you for the very constructive replies...

I, myself, believe that love can sort of be cultivated for someone as bro Five Stone has mentioned, yes - we can appreciate this person. However, is it for obvious reasons that we have done so? The most common I can think of

- all my friends are married EXCEPT me!
- Oh..look at the calender, I'm 35 tomorrow...and alone still
- we've already been together for 7 years...i guess this person is the one
- mummy thinks she's the best choice
- again, etc, etc

To bro qw2op, sometimes or even usually, we don't get what we want...but this is just for discussion of "what may have been"?

JWNY

[Five Stone]

One cannot keeps pondering if she is the right choice, the right one. No one is the right one if you do not look beyond what she has to offer and more importantly, what do you yourself want? You can choose to love and be love back, anyone of us in the right mind are passionate animals, we let our heart rules more than the mind. Learn to love first, perhaps one that you did not love as much may turn out to be the one you love most in the years to come.

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Originally Posted by JWNY

- all my friends are married EXCEPT me!
- Oh..look at the calender, I'm 35 tomorrow...and alone still
- we've already been together for 7 years...i guess this person is the one
- mummy thinks she's the best choice
- again, etc, etc

allow me to wish u happy bday in advance bro.maybe can ask for her hand on ur bday,romantic wor.wish u two all the best and may ur wishes come true.

[generalsegal]

Originally Posted by JWNY

Hope everyone is enjoying the holidays and thank you for the very constructive replies...

I, myself, believe that love can sort of be cultivated for someone as bro Five Stone has mentioned, yes - we can appreciate this person. However, is it for obvious reasons that we have done so? The most common I can think of

- all my friends are married EXCEPT me!
- Oh..look at the calender, I'm 35 tomorrow...and alone still
- we've already been together for 7 years...i guess this person is the one
- mummy thinks she's the best choice
- again, etc, etc

To bro qw2op, sometimes or even usually, we don't get what we want...but this is just for discussion of "what may have been"?

JWNY

As same age as you this year , I had lost few gals which ( very very love one) now , I dont wanted to marry at all , leave all to the Lord .

Never get the very love one is always happen to many of them ,sadly world .

[asdfghjkl]

i heard someone said to me.. guys only like those gals who dun like them? true or false ah?

[Huo_Yuan_Jia]

love is magical and yet sometimes comical.love like life is ironic.it is not smth within my control sometimes.thats y there is this phrase "Let nature takes it course".If its mean to be urs,it will be.

[page||]

usually one shouldn't marry just for the sake of getting married..

there has gotta be some understanding between the two parties and cohesion and feelings in the first place if not both wont be attracted together in th first place.

[David_Ginola]

Originally Posted by chick

99% of the pple around me are so.....the person they married is not the person they loved most in their lifetime...

totally agreed with the above statement. Maybe only 1 in a million couples love each others the most. Also my surrounding friends, colleagues are the 99%. Is quite difficult to have a perfect match, but good to those who had it.

Cheers

[reebok77]

Originally Posted by JWNY

Hope everyone is enjoying the holidays and thank you for the very constructive replies...

I, myself, believe that love can sort of be cultivated for someone as bro Five Stone has mentioned, yes - we can appreciate this person. However, is it for obvious reasons that we have done so? The most common I can think of

- all my friends are married EXCEPT me!
- Oh..look at the calender, I'm 35 tomorrow...and alone still
- we've already been together for 7 years...i guess this person is the one
- mummy thinks she's the best choice
- again, etc, etc

To bro qw2op, sometimes or even usually, we don't get what we want...but this is just for discussion of "what may have been"?

JWNY

We share the same birthday.

I agree with the point that love can be cultivated. Look at the past, people are matchmate and their marriage still last a life time.

[jemz]

i thought i had married the man i loved most

but it turned out that he's:

- irresponsible
- violent
- bad-tempered
- selfish
- immature

most of what he say was dua-kanging me. marry liao den turns out most of the time he talk big only. even to me and family, he act as if he knows everything and has got it all under controlled. he do bizness wait for people to look and refer to him instead of actively going out to look for sales. so we have many other commitments and bills, i end up bao-ing everything for him. even his handphone bills and house loans. summore i take home 1k a month. how to maintain? my savings running dry but he also dont care. never thought about saving money for the house. everytime talk to him about money he say he's stressed out. i'm the one working my ass off, feeding and clothing him, giving him a shelter and he's telling me he's stressed out? i come back still need to do housework, cook and keep him company.

what is love? i think it's BS. at least, in my case, it's already faded... i loved him but he just made me give up on him.

[giggz83]

i tot during the time you know each other to the time you married him .. you should knw his character already?

it seems that all his negative traits are a surprise to u now.

[asdfghjkl]

Perry Tong - it is very dangerous to hear one side of the story.. please invite your dar dar here so we can quiz him..