Anybody caught cheating before? How did you deal with it?

[Xgenre]

Originally Posted by joker1231

because girl B started by stealing you while still with girl A. So she is insecure and always afraid of you doing that. and I can imagine a relationship that is always full of suspicion is energy-draining and not peaceful

Actually if you analyse the underlying emotion, the short term emotion is the same. If a girl leaves her bf for another guy or if a guy leaves her gf for another girl, the third party will feel an immediate ego boost. Wow I am attractive enough for someone to leave their gf/bf for me. I feel wanted and attractive. Short term wise not much different for the 3rd party guy/girl.

Long term wise will be very different. Many guys will not hesistate or worry much to pump and dump the girl they woo over. But for the ladies, once they kenna pumped, they worry about kenna dumped. The insecurity they feel will be much more and may increase over time.

I've seen how such 3rd party ladies behave in marriage should they eventually get married. They will try to lock up the guy by making it painful for him to leave her (women's charter, control freak about family finances, using the kids to threaten the husband, decouple the property to be in her name, belittle the man in public just to show who wears the pants in the family etc)

[77guy]

Few years back, have a heated quarrel with my china mistress and she walk away angrily, till today i regret not chasing after her....she head straight to my house (my bad to let her know my address) and knock on the door...told wifey everything.....while i went drinking with a frd(after the quarrel)...wifey called, have a rush hm with my frd, by the time we reach, my china gal have left....wife was very claim but i know shes very mad n disappointed with me...end up have to knee down n cry to my wife to beg for forgiveness(after my frd left of cos)....she did forgive me but on and off whenever chances arrive...she will still nag at me about my affairs with china woman...btw my wifey is working and earning her own salary(does not depends on me to survive)...she can forgive but never forget.
As for china mistress, i was very mad with her initially but end up still patch back with her as we are together long time(more than 10yrs already) so i just cant let go, for wifey, the same thing, from gf to wife(almost 20yrs) hence i cant let go also...juz hope wont be caught again.....

[wattonhenry]

Amazing. Are you some senior management at some MNC? You can obviously manage very well and work well under pressure. I won’t be able to live a life like that man. Congratulations.

Originally Posted by 77guy

Few years back, have a heated quarrel with my china mistress and she walk away angrily, till today i regret not chasing after her....she head straight to my house (my bad to let her know my address) and knock on the door...told wifey everything.....while i went drinking with a frd(after the quarrel)...wifey called, have a rush hm with my frd, by the time we reach, my china gal have left....wife was very claim but i know shes very mad n disappointed with me...end up have to knee down n cry to my wife to beg for forgiveness(after my frd left of cos)....she did forgive me but on and off whenever chances arrive...she will still nag at me about my affairs with china woman...btw my wifey is working and earning her own salary(does not depends on me to survive)...she can forgive but never forget.
As for china mistress, i was very mad with her initially but end up still patch back with her as we are together long time(more than 10yrs already) so i just cant let go, for wifey, the same thing, from gf to wife(almost 20yrs) hence i cant let go also...juz hope wont be caught again.....

[wantedbryan]

Originally Posted by Xgenre

Actually if you analyse the underlying emotion, the short term emotion is the same. If a girl leaves her bf for another guy or if a guy leaves her gf for another girl, the third party will feel an immediate ego boost. Wow I am attractive enough for someone to leave their gf/bf for me. I feel wanted and attractive. Short term wise not much different for the 3rd party guy/girl.

Long term wise will be very different. Many guys will not hesistate or worry much to pump and dump the girl they woo over. But for the ladies, once they kenna pumped, they worry about kenna dumped. The insecurity they feel will be much more and may increase over time.

I've seen how such 3rd party ladies behave in marriage should they eventually get married. They will try to lock up the guy by making it painful for him to leave her (women's charter, control freak about family finances, using the kids to threaten the husband, decouple the property to be in her name, belittle the man in public just to show who wears the pants in the family etc)

3rd party lady are super insecure and it make your life a living hell. better think twice before getting with one.

[Shawshanks]

3 GFs currently. One divorced, one widow and one single.

All know I have a wife but doesn't know there are each other.

They know I cannot meet them frequently so they are fine with that.

I also dunno how I manage to hook 3.

[itguy2008]

Originally Posted by 77guy

Few years back, have a heated quarrel with my china mistress and she walk away angrily, till today i regret not chasing after her....she head straight to my house (my bad to let her know my address) and knock on the door...told wifey everything.....while i went drinking with a frd(after the quarrel)...wifey called, have a rush hm with my frd, by the time we reach, my china gal have left....wife was very claim but i know shes very mad n disappointed with me...end up have to knee down n cry to my wife to beg for forgiveness(after my frd left of cos)....she did forgive me but on and off whenever chances arrive...she will still nag at me about my affairs with china woman...btw my wifey is working and earning her own salary(does not depends on me to survive)...she can forgive but never forget.
As for china mistress, i was very mad with her initially but end up still patch back with her as we are together long time(more than 10yrs already) so i just cant let go, for wifey, the same thing, from gf to wife(almost 20yrs) hence i cant let go also...juz hope wont be caught again.....

Did it cross your mind that your wife may know but chose to keep quiet instead?

[AdmiralR]

Originally Posted by Shawshanks

3 GFs currently. One divorced, one widow and one single.

All know I have a wife but doesn't know there are each other.

They know I cannot meet them frequently so they are fine with that.

I also dunno how I manage to hook 3.

Sounds like a full time job haha

[donut88]

Originally Posted by Shawshanks

3 GFs currently. One divorced, one widow and one single.

All know I have a wife but doesn't know there are each other.

They know I cannot meet them frequently so they are fine with that.

I also dunno how I manage to hook 3.

I'm similar to you, except that I only have 2 GFs, not 3. Lol

[dumbling]

Originally Posted by Shawshanks

3 GFs currently. One divorced, one widow and one single.

All know I have a wife but doesn't know there are each other.

They know I cannot meet them frequently so they are fine with that.

I also dunno how I manage to hook 3.

perfect life lol.
1 experienced
1maybe more spoiled and adorable
1maybe wise and understanding

and 1 queen at home who always serves

you're lucky

[torogun]

die die dont admit, dont want extra trouble in this stressful life

[oxeso]

Originally Posted by torogun

die die dont admit

Ts hilang.. u maybe rite..

[Axksiwz]

won't admit it until the end lol. focused on trying to convince my wife and doing lots of sweet things to seduce her so that her mind was distracted. and definitely stop cheating for a moment

[SugerU]

Originally Posted by joker1231

because girl B started by stealing you while still with girl A. So she is insecure and always afraid of you doing that. and I can imagine a relationship that is always full of suspicion is energy-draining and not peaceful

She afraid get karma 😅 lol .

[t123]

Recently my friend got me trying to cover up for him. But he himself suay siao, when alcohol start working, he will verbally abused his gf on the phone. Under this kind of situation, even he doesn’t cheats, she still thinks he does. End up the gf become a bit clingy to me.

[Ovitz]

How I deal with it will depend on the dynamics and consequence, eg, does the other girl know about it.

If I am dominant in the relationship, I will admit and say I'm sorry if I want to continue on with primary.
If the secondary is better for me and she does not know, I will also admit to primary and end it.

I will always choose wherever I can maintain my dominance in the relationship, saves a whole lot more problems down the way.

If I cannot decide, maintain as is, do not admit, spin story along quirks of my character.