Does the so call " true love " still exist???

[jinrenhe]

Originally Posted by surfer888

Imagine reliving the trauma of breaking up with your most loved over and over again. It's almost been 10 years already with this tradition being repeated.

dun really understand sorry. why? it's cos she doesn't live in S'pore??

For me, it's the same scenario which keeps repeating itself over the different relationships i went through over the years...

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by Deztruct

remind me of the movie '50 first dates'

to me..u are in a beta position coz at least u get bbbj!!!

but we all noe tat deep inside our heart..u are in a worse position bcoz u hv to keep reliving ur life as if life is in a loop

Argggh... just dreamt of her last night. Dreamt that she wanted me back... did not want to wake up.... sigh!

First 50 dates? Was that the one with Drew Barrymore having amnesia? Can't remember but I think it was a happy ending, right? For my sake, I sure do hope so.....

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by jinrenhe

dun really understand sorry. why? it's cos she doesn't live in S'pore??

For me, it's the same scenario which keeps repeating itself over the different relationships i went through over the years...

She's not local but it's only part of the problem.

The bigger problem is that every now and then she would accept me as her boyfriend... only to change her mind a few days later.

In fact, I have not contacted her for about 3 months already. She wrote me an email on my b'day and told me never to call her again. She has sinced moved her residence and took up another phone number which I do not have. My only avenue to contact her now is her email.

I've grown to be not too nervous about this already as she has done this many times. Always breaking up with me for no reason and on my b'day, v-day, x'mas, new year etc.... on extremely memorable occasions only. Sometimes, it will be 2-3 years before I hear from her again and she would behave as though nothing else happened and we get together as lovers again.

It's weird and very difficult to cope with... but after 10 yrs, I've learnt to harden myself and enjoy the good times with her when they come. When the bad times come, I'll just roll with the punches and carry on with my life.

[vesfreq]

Originally Posted by jinrenhe

This mornin i woke up to the dazzling warm sun and feel it's actually beautiful to be alive & healthy... can go anywhere i want, eat nice food
The hardest part, i fathom, is keep this positivity throughout. cos from time to time, i'll slip into a depressive state filled with unhappy thoughts...

Its truly hard.

The girl I liked was asking me out to meet the other guys. Sometimes, like nothing much to talk about. Its nicer to be alone and do anything without having to think about the rest around.

Originally Posted by jinrenhe

Later in the afternoon, i also went to Vivocity to jalan jalan... wow got many nice restaurants & cafe situated along the side which oversee the beautiful harbour view. Standing outside one of the cafeteria, i couldn't enter & has a bittersweet feelin... it's not that i've no money in my pocket, but such a nice place & nice view somewhat feels lacking in something ...without her

I went to various places like Vivocity before. There was once I drove alone to the beach. Looking out alone and stared hard at the surroundings.

At one time, I lamented that I didn't have the money. But, having it now only make me feel somewhat helpless sometimes. Money can't buy certain things like... the time with her. The moment when we were in embrace.

I missed her so much without realising that I held another girl's hand... saying "I miss you so much..." Loving her like crazy. Probably the 2nd girl I ever did this much for.

Originally Posted by jinrenhe

it's such a 无奈 feeling sometimes... not as thou we are miles apart in different country, not that i can't afford to bring her out. But simply cos her heart does not belong to me.
Today i finally comprehend what people mean when they say "So near, yet so far"...

Sigh.... "Ai Yi Ge Ren Bu Yi Ding Yao Yong You"... A girl would always tell me this. But, "Bu Yi Ding Shi Yong You, Dan Zhi Qiu Duo Yi Ge Ji Hui" (Not asking to possess someone, but a chance to be).

[FA-22 Raptor]

True love? You might think that the one who is your GF for over 7 years and got married another 10 yrs will be your TRUE LOVE? Hahahaha.....take a good look at me.....I been thru it and guess what, if its not for the 2 kids, I will have divorce her long ago. Haizzzz...Married life is not a bed of roses.

When I got married, I thought that I would escape from the constant nagging from my parents but I jumped from the frying pan into the fire. Everyday kanna persistence nagging from wife. WTF......HAIZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

My advise to those who are singles, enjoy the sunshine while you can. Once you are married, a thunderstorm will be heading your way especially when the kids arrives...

PS: If given a choice right now, I rather remain SINGLE. How I wish that I can turn back the clock.

[jintulan]

first time reading this thread today, wow! the most interesting one on this board so far! so many brothers here looking for true love. here's my 2 cents...

Originally Posted by FA-22 Raptor

True love? You might think that the one who is your GF for over 7 years and got married another 10 yrs will be your TRUE LOVE? Hahahaha.....take a good look at me.....I been thru it and guess what, if its not for the 2 kids, I will have divorce her long ago. Haizzzz...Married life is not a bed of roses...

bro. Raptor, I'm going into my 20th year now... know exactly what you mean. I've lost count how many times those thoughts of divorce went in and out of my brain over the years. Like you, the kids kept me hanging in there through the rough patches. But you know what? People change, I changed, my wife's behavior's changed too!
I once thought I knew and felt true love. If you ask me today, I'd say I have no idea what true love is, I really don't. What I do know is that after the bed of roses have been trampled into a rotten mess, it's entirely up to each person to clean up the mess and tidy up the place. Yes, I also know that this is possible, it's shitty hard work, but it can be done. After that is done, some new feelings will arise, I don't know if it qualifies as true love. It's good, but I don't know what to call it.

Originally Posted by FA-22 Raptor

...When I got married, I thought that I would escape from the constant nagging from my parents but I jumped from the frying pan into the fire...

an unfortunate truth for many of us, yes. Every man ought to be prepared for this fire.

Originally Posted by FA-22 Raptor

...My advise to those who are singles, enjoy the sunshine while you can. Once you are married, a thunderstorm will be heading your way especially when the kids arrives...

PS: If given a choice right now, I rather remain SINGLE. How I wish that I can turn back the clock.

I don't know how much of this is within the control of one's choice. True love or fake love, people will continue to get married. We just have to learn to manage things along the way.

to all brothers here, I hope you find True Love. But please remember that there are fires and potholes along this road. If you drop into one, get up. If you drop into another one, get up again. If you get burned, keep going, don't give up. DON'T! JUST KEEP GOING!

I wish every man in this world a safe journey....

[Happywheel]

Originally Posted by FA-22 Raptor

True love? You might think that the one who is your GF for over 7 years and got married another 10 yrs will be your TRUE LOVE? Hahahaha.....take a good look at me.....I been thru it and guess what, if its not for the 2 kids, I will have divorce her long ago. Haizzzz...Married life is not a bed of roses.

When I got married, I thought that I would escape from the constant nagging from my parents but I jumped from the frying pan into the fire. Everyday kanna persistence nagging from wife. WTF......HAIZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

My advise to those who are singles, enjoy the sunshine while you can. Once you are married, a thunderstorm will be heading your way especially when the kids arrives...

PS: If given a choice right now, I rather remain SINGLE. How I wish that I can turn back the clock.

Sometimes i do want to find true love & settle down. I'm wondering what i would be if the day comes...
i forsee more worries and stresses for myself
Some people regret getting married whereas some simply enjoy being family man. Most of the times, i'd hear complaint from friends especially when kids arrive..more sleepless night. My friend tell me his wife will turn her attention and care towards the child and dump him aside. Is that true...i only believe him 50%..hahaha

[Deztruct]

Originally Posted by surfer888

Argggh... just dreamt of her last night. Dreamt that she wanted me back... did not want to wake up.... sigh!

First 50 dates? Was that the one with Drew Barrymore having amnesia? Can't remember but I think it was a happy ending, right? For my sake, I sure do hope so.....

i hv dreams like tat which i hope i will neva wake up from but in the end..its only a dream..tell urself tat at least u are happy in the dreams

ya..tats the one..but dun forget..there is only a happy ending coz the guy work hard at it..imagine hving to keep chasing the same ger every day and the next morning she will forget who u are

[Deztruct]

Originally Posted by surfer888

She's not local but it's only part of the problem.

a long distance relationship is always difficult..i seen a few fail but i believe in miracle and i believe in love..bro..all the best..i hv this frd overseas also..i wun say i noe her every well bcoz we hardly neva +++ but still at tat pt of time..i will fly to her country juz to find her..even tat 5 mins being with her..i will totally forget abt all the troubles i hv bcoz she is really tat innocent and she has this way of comforting me thru the gaze of her eyes

[jinrenhe]

Originally Posted by surfer888

Always breaking up with me for no reason and on my b'day, v-day, x'mas, new year etc.... on extremely memorable occasions only. Sometimes, it will be 2-3 years before I hear from her again and she would behave as though nothing else happened and we get together as lovers again.

It's weird and very difficult to cope with... but after 10 yrs, I've learnt to harden myself and enjoy the good times with her when they come. When the bad times come, I'll just roll with the punches and carry on with my life.

hmm.. maybe to her, u are someone she really loves , but for some reasons feel she cannot be committed to...

reminds me of my past experience and the song 每次醒来 by Andy Lau:

我每次醒来都怕你不在
我每次都想挣脱你醒来
终於明白生命里面总有个人
可以去爱不能依赖

It seems that in life, there would always be this special person whom we love (very deeply) but yet cannot rely on for happiness... which is what the other thread was discussing about- the person whom we settled down eventually may not be the person we loved most...

[vesfreq]

Originally Posted by Deztruct

i hv dreams like tat which i hope i will neva wake up from but in the end..its only a dream..tell urself tat at least u are happy in the dreams

ya..tats the one..but dun forget..there is only a happy ending coz the guy work hard at it..imagine hving to keep chasing the same ger every day and the next morning she will forget who u are

I wish I can have the same dream about her, one more time. To have her in my arms.

[dominion]

To all bros facing the same problem as I have, my best wishes for the future.

I also have one that is so close yet so far away. Unlike Destruct's mine is here but always so called busy most of the time these days. Perhaps busy, but probably just not a priority anymore. I don't bother to contact and she doesn't too. I've learnt to leave and let go. Yest, went shopping myself when I happened to be in orchard. Bought some books and DVD for myself. Ppl everywhere walking in pairs and cuddling. But I no longer felt insecure anymore. Yes I'm single, not proud of it but not ashamed of it either. Im not ashamed that there're no eligible girls where I am now and that I'm too shy to sian casual acquaintances.

I still hope to meet a true love somewhere someday but I no longer bear the burden of having no one by my side. Since I cannot find happiness, why should I give myself more miserable by hankering after it? I shall just try to keep myself happy in the mean time in my interminable wait for my Ms Right

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by jinrenhe

hmm.. maybe to her, u are someone she really loves , but for some reasons feel she cannot be committed to...

reminds me of my past experience and the song 每次醒来 by Andy Lau:

我每次醒来都怕你不在
我每次都想挣脱你醒来
终於明白生命里面总有个人
可以去爱不能依赖

It seems that in life, there would always be this special person whom we love (very deeply) but yet cannot rely on for happiness... which is what the other thread was discussing about- the person whom we settled down eventually may not be the person we loved most...

OMG! Maybe she really loves me...
... there is a reason why she cannot feel commited to me... it's because I married someone else during one of our breakups many years back.

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by Deztruct

a long distance relationship is always difficult..i seen a few fail but i believe in miracle and i believe in love..bro..all the best..i hv this frd overseas also..i wun say i noe her every well bcoz we hardly neva +++ but still at tat pt of time..i will fly to her country juz to find her..even tat 5 mins being with her..i will totally forget abt all the troubles i hv bcoz she is really tat innocent and she has this way of comforting me thru the gaze of her eyes

I've only flown once to her country... that was during my honeymoon... Sneaked out of the hotel and attempted to meet her. Was rejected of course.

Since then, she has been flying to Singapore regularly and sometimes stays at my place when my wife is out on business.

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by vesfreq

I wish I can have the same dream about her, one more time. To have her in my arms.

Yeah... never want to wake up. But sometimes, I dread dreams like these. You wake up feeling empty and broken-hearted.