Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

[Hurricane88]

Idi Amin once wanted to change the name of Uganda to Idi because he thought he could do anything with Uganda. Everybody was afraid to challenge that decision except for one man called Maliamungu who was close to him. He said: 'your excellency sir, do you know Cyprus'? Idi Amin with a surprised look asked, "what has Cyprus got to do with my decision to change our name to Idi?" Maliamungu said, "the people of Cyprus are called Cypriots , so if you change Uganda to Idi, we will be called Idiots! Including your good self sir, so please let's maintain our name". Idi Amin said 'aah... Maliamungu!, you are very intelligent. In fact, more intelligent than everyone in Uganda except me' 😂😂😀🙏

Enjoy Your day and Release Some Stress! We will defeat this COVID-19.

[Hurricane88]

🎓Can it get geographically punnier than this?

Timmy : I'm Hungary.
Mum : Why don't you Czech the fridge?
Timmy : Okay, I'm Russian to the kitchen.
Mum : Hmm ... maybe you'll find some Turkey.
Timmy : Yeah, but its all covered in Greece. Yucks!
Mum : There is Norway you can eat that.
Timmy : I know, I guess I'll just have a can of Chile.
Mum : Denmark your name on the can.
Timmy : Kenya do it for me?
Mum : Okay, I'm Ghana do it.
Timmy : Thanks, I'm so tired - Iran for an hour today.
Mum : It Tokyo long enough.
Timmy : Yeah, Israelly hard sometimes!

[Hurricane88]

[SBMEDSUP]

Thanks for all the nice jokes.

[ah rat]

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[Masterl23]

Originally Posted by ah rat

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Good share bro.

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...

[Hurricane88]

25 YEARS OF MARRIAGE WITHOUT A FIGHT

A man and his wife
never fought for 25 years
of their marriage.
A friend asked him how he had managed to make it possible.
He narrated:

"We went for our Honeymoon in Australia 25 years ago
and while riding on a horse,
My wife's horse jumped and my wife fell down.
She got up,patted the horse's back and said
"This is your first time"

After a while it happened again.
She patted the horse again and said:
"This is your second time"

The horse did it again the 3rd time,
She brought out a gun and sh-ot the horse dead

I Was so shocked and I shouted at her. . . . . . . ."Are you cr-azy! What's wrong with you?
Why did you kill the horse?

She smiled at me and said
"This is your first time darling"

Since then. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
My Mouth Pim🤐🤐😷😂

[Hurricane88]

[ah rat]

__________________________

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...

[Hurricane88]

[Hurricane88]

[Hurricane88]

Three dogs, a Doberman, a Boxer, and a Labrador are sitting in the waiting room at the vet's office when they strike up a conversation.

The Doberman turns to the Boxer and says, "So why are you here?"
"I'm a pisser," the Boxer replies, "I piss on everything - the sofa, the cat, the kid. But the final straw was last night, when I pissed in the middle of my owner's bed."

"So what is the vet going to do?" the Doberman asks.

"Castration" came the sad reply from the Boxer.

The Doberman then turns to the Labrador and asks, "Why are you here?"

"I'm a digger," said the Labrador. "I dig under fences, dig up flowers and trees. I dig just for the hell of it. When I'm inside, I dig up the carpets. But I went over the line last night when I dug a great big hole in my owner's couch."

"So what are they going to do to you?" the Doberman inquired.

"Castration," the dejected Labrador said.

The Labrador then asks the Doberman why he's at the vet's office..

"I'm a screwer," the Doberman says. "I'll screw anything. I'll screw the cat, a pillow, the table, fire hydrants, whatever. I want to screw- everything I see. Yesterday, my owner had just gotten out of the shower and was bending down to dry her toes, and I just couldn't help myself. I hopped on her back and started screwing away."

The Boxer and Labrador exchange a sad glance and say, "So, Castration for you too, huh?"

"No, no," the Doberman says,
"She got me here to get my nails clipped."

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...