Attracted to married ex-gf!

[tanalfred]

Dear fellow samsters,

Life has been a little uneventful since my last encounter at the pool, until I happened to bump into my ex-gf at Raffles City. We subsequently met up a few more times. One thing is that she is now married. While we didn't talk much in detail about the past where we were together for a couple of years before parting due to some personal reasons, I could still sense the closeness. There was no ill-feelings about each other as we parted on mutual agreement. Recalling the times we were together just makes me feel like holding her in my arms again.

I can sense that she still feels very comfortable with me, opening up herself and sharing very personal stuff with me during those times we met. Her sex life isn't all that perky from what I can sense as they are both very busy executives, and I know she still likes that sensitive part of me which is absent in her present husband. Our meetings have always been at public eateries, and over lunch, which has time-constraint. Hence, we had often ended our chats relunctantly and sometimes abruptly too. I asked her if she was willing to take leave and spend some time together, and she vaguely agreed, but no concrete dates have been set.

I'm caught in a dilema now. We're at a point where I can sense we'd like to be a little more intimate. However, being intimate with her would mean she'll be unfaithful to her hubby. So what should I do?

Some advice would help. Thanks!

[tanalfred]

Oh gee... I trampled into the thread by "LonelyLad" entitled "How to bonk ex-wifes?". Seems to have some similarities to my case, but concluded that the ball is in her court and not mine.

I'm unattached and free, while she's tied down and probably unsatisfied.

[thaivisitor]

Bro, you are a nice guy. Remain one.

Don't do to others, what you don't want them to do to you. Imagine it's your wife.

Thaivisitor’s Annual Samsters Trip to Hatyai!

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[slippers]

how would you feel if someone asked about this regarding your gf or wife in future?
Even if she initiates something, i believe its two parties fault too.
Do not do unto others what you wouldn't want others to do to you. =)

[cbjuiceyumseng]

Originally Posted by thaivisitor

Bro, you are a nice guy. Remain one.

Don't do to others, what you don't want them to do to you. Imagine it's your wife.

Thaivisitor’s Annual Samsters Trip to Hatyai!

.

Ya...TV is right. I know its damn tempting but...morally it is wrong...but leh.....nvm.

[casannova03]

hmmmm....very tempting....like what some bros have said its better to steer away..however being men, we cannot deny that sometimes our smaller head just takes control...maybe you can just go ahead but DO NOT get into a prolonged relationship as the hubby will sure find out one day ... i sense that you still have feelings for her...so maybe just get together for a once off rendevous and then explain to her that you do not want things to go out of control and then risk her happiness.....so long as her husband dun find out it wun hurt him....hmmmm very long opinion but hope it helps...Just my 3 cent's worth...

[spider_j]

Sometimes the best and right path is the hardest path to take.

If you still feel attracted to her and her to you, I think the best thing is to cut off all contact whatsoever, that is, if you dun want to do anything wrong lah. I'm guessing since you parted on good terms, you won't want to fuck up things with her and her husband now right?

You wanna stay the 'nice guy' from her past, you should also try to stay away from her and provocative topics like her sex life lah. This kinda talk only stirs up emotions and memories that should be best left behind. Since you have both moved on, go on with your life. She can remain a nice memory and stay as such. Anybody can tell you that you shouldn't do anything with her, but the only person who can do anything about how you feel is yourself. SO do what you feel is right. I'm sure you know what that is. Nobody needs to tell you. What you are doing here is trying to get support for you NOT to do something bad.

But no matter whoever anybody says, the choice remains with you. Either you want to fuck her life up (and yours) or stay the hell away.

My personal belief is that once you part with someone, you shouldnt go back. Trust your initial decision that you have done the right thing. Live life looking forwards, not backwards. Lots of WLs as well as single girls out there to sate your sexual appetites.

I sincerely hope that you will make the right choice and have the strength to follow through.

:P

[joerush72]

well, as outsiders, all we can do is advise you.. the choice is ultimately yours.. however, do remember, that in proceeding ahead to fulfill your lust.. you might ultimately be condemned by society/relatives/friends and people who know you..

i agree with what bro spider has just said.. you should abstain from seeing her lest you want to risk getting condemned by everyone.. why not just pay $100 - 200 and go GL and get a WL if all you want is an intercourse? or go pubbing/clubbing and pick up a chick n progress with that relationship if you are looking for that "feeling" ?

[wankmehappy]

Originally Posted by tanalfred

Oh gee... I trampled into the thread by "LonelyLad" entitled "How to bonk ex-wifes?". Seems to have some similarities to my case, but concluded that the ball is in her court and not mine.

I'm unattached and free, while she's tied down and probably unsatisfied.

bro, i can understand how you feel...used to be in your position...bump into my 1st love during a busy day in shenton way....exchange contact & manage to fix for dinner to do some catching up with her....think about 6 yrs ago when we broke up...1st, it was just a normal meal...we talk about how things have change & what have happen during these few yrs...suddenly, i have this very strong feeling that i still miss her...looking into her eyes...i know that she feels the same way too...btw she was married & im still single...just like you...aftertat appointment, we met up alot of times...feeling become stronger each times we meet...
things happen during 1 clubbing outing with her...we both have a few drinks & don't know how...we both ended up in her hse...that times, her hubby was out-station...the fire in us start to burn...it like wild fire...kisses & hugging....soon, we are both in our birth suit...she give me a real good bbbj....in return...i put in my best svc to her...we will both so high.....when i feel she is really for me, i ask her if she have any CD at hm & she pointed to the drawer...at that point of time....all actions STOP.....a pic of she & her hubby....senses of shames make us stop what we are doing...i feel so guity...
i know she felt that too...
end up...we didnt process on & i leave her hse...from then onward...both of us didn't contact one another anymore....
just week before chinese new year....i went to KK hospital to visit one of my relative...im with my GF during that time...just what...i saw my ex gf again...this time round...she is with her hubby...on her arm, was a newly born baby...like long lost fren...we intro both of us to our partners....hand shake was exchange...at that point of time...i know i did the right thing...we didnt carry on...i don't have that sense of guitiness in me...im happy that i can look straight at her hubby & baby....im happy to see that they are so happy with the new born....
at times i still think of her but this will be a dark secert in me...no more feeling of lust ....
i have share my real life experience with you....final call is still up to you...whether you want to be a man that can walk with your head high up or as low as ur chin touches your chest is up to you...it your life...just take it like a man if things goes wrong.....
cheers.......

[oldies]

Bro

You know when to make the U-turn and did the right thing at the right time.

Cool!

[l3atu]

Originally Posted by tanalfred

I'm caught in a dilema now. We're at a point where I can sense we'd like to be a little more intimate. However, being intimate with her would mean she'll be unfaithful to her hubby. So what should I do?

Some advice would help. Thanks!

If one day u got caught by her hubby when u are having a date with her, it would do her marriage no good at all...u wan to see her have a broken marriage ? I guess not...

[95-emperor]

I personally agree
I believe no guys wana their wife to betray them right.
So what goes around comes around...

Bro what you want is just sex and lsut and
their are so many other ways and sources

What you have is the past memories and I strong suggests you
should move on and look for other targets.

Although it is a no commitment affairs but what happens nxt time
you have a family and 1 day she bring a child and claims it is yours.
Or if one day you get caught by her husband and get involve ia a fight
and news soon spread to your friends/families/boss/ collegues
What will people think of you ? What type of person are you ?
YOu still have intergity ?
I believe you don't wish to see this happen right

It just my personal point of view..........
NEVER NEVER GET INVOLVE with a MARRIED Person.

[japboy]

after reading dis thread, it sort of touched a sensitive cord in mi heart...

sum times ur small head screams a bit too loud 2 ignore but mi advice is not 2 turn back... mi motto is "Good horse dun eat grass on its route back"....

well, strong past feelings will surface once u n ur past get together again... n indeed it's so strong n powerful dat makes both think dat both of u r well together again n everything is rosy...

but once u r back together again, all d ills frm d past will surface as well... d way both felt unhappy abt each other n stuff like dat...

i think u will always feel smth special towards all ur past n do secretly longed 2 go back 2 d haydays... but both of u lost d opportunity 2 b together for goot n hence shld look forward n stay status quo.....

things will get very nasty very fast when things got discovered n i remembered one of mi frenz had dat kinda experience which i do not think u would wanna experience...

mi 2cents worth

[rahl]

Bro, my opinion is, you parted on good terms. But the next time you part, if you make a move on her now, may not be on good terms.

Dont dig a hole for yourself. There are still gals around who can give you that same comfort and closeness. Just takes time and opportunity.

Cheers.

[asdfghjkl]

yep.. better dun be a third party ler.. its bad..