Need advise on my thai relationship

[Dwayne8282]

Hi there. Have been dating this thai girl who i came to know in singapore when she was here on holiday (real holiday after i checked her background). We ht it off and soon i was going over to her place about 100km away from BKK every month to visit her. She is quite a well to do lady with assets and many businesses. First trip was good she brought me to Pattaya and we had spent all the time together. Subsequent trips she has always been busy. Its like when i checked if she will be free on this date and she said she will be but then when i fly over, work catches up as she has to travel between states and traffic jam is a killer. She also has family commitments and has to tend to her businesses and so has almost no time for me. But whenever i come back to singapore i noticed that she always has time for her friends (mostly all are female friends) and this irks me. She has told me on many occasions that she loves me but she has no time as she is always busy. Furthermore she has never been in a relationship before and she doesnt know how to handle one. I verified this part by checking with her cousins and friends and even runninng through her hp as i didnt believe at first. After that i found out that indeed she is a very conservative person who has never had a bf before. She almost never messages or calls me unless i do it first. She never has the habit of msging good morning or good night. Even my calls to her goes unanswered. I personally witnessed that she ignores the calls of her parents despite them repeatedly trying to contact her and she is doing the same to me. She replies or calls back hours later only. But when with me, she is always on her hp surfing fb for online deals or selling her online stuff and replying to her friends/clients. Am really tired of this and have suggested breaking up on a few occasions but she started crying and said she will change but apparently she is still the same. She has never taken any money from me and in fact pays whenever i am there (but mostly i pay la coz i dont believe in letting a woman pay for me). She doesnt speak english that well also. Maybe 2/10

Lately i met a gal from bkk and she is the complete opposite. She is not rich, works in a media firm and speaks english very well. She has been giving me the emotional need that i crave for. But the problem is do not want to two-time either of them and so have not told this girl about my feelings towards her.

My question is what should i do? I love my gf but she does not seem to change. I am starting to like this other gal and both of them are pretty attractive for me. I am just confused as to what to do. Would like to seek your opinions please. Are thai girls generally bo chup like my gf (some websites i read placed their family first followed by friends bla bla and lastly the boyfriend). Lastly i have not met my gf’s parents yet, only her cousins and friends if u must know. Feeling very vexed and would appreciate any advise given. Thank you

[Datingafter35]

Nobody wants a needy guy. Especially girls. Make them know you are wanted and those who are anxious will treasure.

[MoeLanYong]

Tough call bro. I had to think a while about it.

You are not married. There is no reason to stick. Both you and your gf are at the Exploratory stage. To me, your gf sounds so normal. She does not dislike you. She just has her own life. Used to her independence. And this will be the situation AFTER you guys are married. Can you take it?

Your new acquaintance seems like a good fit. BUT she has not gone into that Exploratory stage with you yet. You know how it works. A prospect always get treated better than a customer. Or simply, the grass is greener on the either side. You may be judging your situation wrongly. Without an equal opportunity with this new girl, you do not have the data to make a fair comparison. For all you know, she becomes too sticky and that's not what you want too. For all you know, maybe she is a player and when she is done with you, finds 3 other men to stick with too.

It is really a tough call bro. I wouldn't want to be you.

Yet it is a good opportunity to make an evaluation.

If you point a gun at my head for an answer, I'd say Follow your heart. There is no right or wrong answer. You are trying to look for a life partner that makes you (and her) happy. If you have to 2 time to find out, then 2 time. Of course, do not get caught. And be very quick to make a decision when you know you have one. Do not straddle 2 boats - it will just make you miserable in the long run.

There must be a natural fit with your gf for her to progress to be your wife. Yes, you should not be too sticky - no girl likes that. But that is you. If you can't stand her indulgence into everything else but you attitude, perhaps she is not The One. And it will be good to find out sooner rather than later.


Edit:
Some girls are just not the sticky kind. My wife is a good example. She does the indulgence-into-everything-except-me thing too. But she turned out to be a gem. She stuck with me for life, through good and through bad. Strong in her love and support for me. She just does not express it through stickiness. I got used to her ways after a while. She is now my wife and best friend. But there is a difference. My wife communicates well with me and her english is not 2/10.

[MoeLanYong]

Originally Posted by Datingafter35

Nobody wants a needy guy. Especially girls. Make them know you are wanted and those who are anxious will treasure.

Wise words. TS, take heed. You may want to consider altering your persona.

[moneymoneycome]

TS, try not calling either one for a while. The one that needs and wants you will call you.

[Masquerader93]

Yeah man, how is it a relationship if she doesn’t know English well. How did you guys hit it off well?

Unless you’re implying that you’re proficient in Thai of course; but I doubt that that’s the case since you brought up the English bit.

And honestly, rather than her not having the time, you just sound very free... Do you actually not have anything else to do? Maybe having something to focus on aside from a relationship can give you a new perspective on things.

[ramon]

Dear TS,

your GF is the independent and business minded type...perhaps she's even more 'man' than you.

My opinion is you should just take it easy with her...you may want her to be more caring or sensitive but you are just a side dish to her. If she ever realise that she needs to show more love...well, it probably would be after you broke up with her. On the other hand, please do continue to date the other lady.

Me think you are in a fortunate situation because you can make your choice of loving your GF or be loved more by someone.

[MassageExpert84]

why not carry on with both ladies and get to know them more first ?

see who is more better and treat you and fulfill your needs then decide who you

want?

[Dwayne8282]

Thanks everyone for your replies. Each and every of your advise makes sense. I will just have to re-evaluate myself and change my needy attitude. Sincerely thanks for your frank reviews.
Happy new year to each and every one of you!

[moneymoneycome]

Originally Posted by Dwayne8282

Thanks everyone for your replies. Each and every of your advise makes sense. I will just have to re-evaluate myself and change my needy attitude. Sincerely thanks for your frank reviews.
Happy new year to each and every one of you!

Bro, must be very careful when dealing with these ladies, when you are with them, they appear to be sweet, faithful, kind,etc, all the positive traits. Once you are not around, their real self surface, multiple partners to party, and do you things that your wildest imagination can think of! Do not be needy, they will treat you as an idoit and chop you like a carrot. After chopping, they will still laugh at you.

[JacqueMerlin]

Originally Posted by Dwayne8282

Hi there. Have been dating this thai girl who i came to know in singapore when she was here on holiday (real holiday after i checked her background). We ht it off and soon i was going over to her place about 100km away from BKK every month to visit her. She is quite a well to do lady with assets and many businesses. First trip was good she brought me to Pattaya and we had spent all the time together. Subsequent trips she has always been busy. Its like when i checked if she will be free on this date and she said she will be but then when i fly over, work catches up as she has to travel between states and traffic jam is a killer. She also has family commitments and has to tend to her businesses and so has almost no time for me. But whenever i come back to singapore i noticed that she always has time for her friends (mostly all are female friends) and this irks me. She has told me on many occasions that she loves me but she has no time as she is always busy. Furthermore she has never been in a relationship before and she doesnt know how to handle one. I verified this part by checking with her cousins and friends and even runninng through her hp as i didnt believe at first. After that i found out that indeed she is a very conservative person who has never had a bf before. She almost never messages or calls me unless i do it first. She never has the habit of msging good morning or good night. Even my calls to her goes unanswered. I personally witnessed that she ignores the calls of her parents despite them repeatedly trying to contact her and she is doing the same to me. She replies or calls back hours later only. But when with me, she is always on her hp surfing fb for online deals or selling her online stuff and replying to her friends/clients. Am really tired of this and have suggested breaking up on a few occasions but she started crying and said she will change but apparently she is still the same. She has never taken any money from me and in fact pays whenever i am there (but mostly i pay la coz i dont believe in letting a woman pay for me). She doesnt speak english that well also. Maybe 2/10

Lately i met a gal from bkk and she is the complete opposite. She is not rich, works in a media firm and speaks english very well. She has been giving me the emotional need that i crave for. But the problem is do not want to two-time either of them and so have not told this girl about my feelings towards her.

My question is what should i do? I love my gf but she does not seem to change. I am starting to like this other gal and both of them are pretty attractive for me. I am just confused as to what to do. Would like to seek your opinions please. Are thai girls generally bo chup like my gf (some websites i read placed their family first followed by friends bla bla and lastly the boyfriend). Lastly i have not met my gf’s parents yet, only her cousins and friends if u must know. Feeling very vexed and would appreciate any advise given. Thank you

Bail yourself out. I sense a trap.

[toiletrolls]

Originally Posted by MoeLanYong

Tough call bro. I had to think a while about it.

You are not married. There is no reason to stick. Both you and your gf are at the Exploratory stage. To me, your gf sounds so normal. She does not dislike you. She just has her own life. Used to her independence. And this will be the situation AFTER you guys are married. Can you take it?

Your new acquaintance seems like a good fit. BUT she has not gone into that Exploratory stage with you yet. You know how it works. A prospect always get treated better than a customer. Or simply, the grass is greener on the either side. You may be judging your situation wrongly. Without an equal opportunity with this new girl, you do not have the data to make a fair comparison. For all you know, she becomes too sticky and that's not what you want too. For all you know, maybe she is a player and when she is done with you, finds 3 other men to stick with too.

It is really a tough call bro. I wouldn't want to be you.

Yet it is a good opportunity to make an evaluation.

If you point a gun at my head for an answer, I'd say Follow your heart. There is no right or wrong answer. You are trying to look for a life partner that makes you (and her) happy. If you have to 2 time to find out, then 2 time. Of course, do not get caught. And be very quick to make a decision when you know you have one. Do not straddle 2 boats - it will just make you miserable in the long run.

There must be a natural fit with your gf for her to progress to be your wife. Yes, you should not be too sticky - no girl likes that. But that is you. If you can't stand her indulgence into everything else but you attitude, perhaps she is not The One. And it will be good to find out sooner rather than later.


Edit:
Some girls are just not the sticky kind. My wife is a good example. She does the indulgence-into-everything-except-me thing too. But she turned out to be a gem. She stuck with me for life, through good and through bad. Strong in her love and support for me. She just does not express it through stickiness. I got used to her ways after a while. She is now my wife and best friend. But there is a difference. My wife communicates well with me and her english is not 2/10.

well said..

[BlueDemon]

I can share your sorrow. Pass me your gf and you can go on with ur new life.

I dunn like to be tied down so she is perfect for me. I am those "Free then meet" type.

[Banecat]

Its a trap bro...get away

[cuscorex92]

nobody is ever "too busy",if they're interested, they'll make time.